


Galarian Wings

by MintyElectronica



Series: Powerverse [2]
Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Characters Turned Into Pokemon, Dubious Science, F/M, Fluff, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Science Fiction, Transformation, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, With a cameo appearance by a very confused Raihan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:28:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 24,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28121637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MintyElectronica/pseuds/MintyElectronica
Summary: Bill and Lanette go on a perfectly normal vacation, at the behest of a bunch of Tumblr followers. Which is to say, Bill turns himself into a dragon, and antics ensue.
Relationships: Mayumi | Lanette/Sonezaki Masaki | Bill
Series: Powerverse [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2053947
Kudos: 7





	1. The best time to have regrets is immediately before executing a bad decision.

**Author's Note:**

> Quick note, but the following (as well as other works in the Powerverse series) are archives of posts from the Tumblr blog, The Pokédex According to Bill ([@bills-pokedex](https://bills-pokedex.tumblr.com)), posted here for easy reference. For more context about the two characters involved here, you'll probs want to hit that blog up. Otherwise, the tl;dr version is that Bill writes advice posts that are then edited by Lanette (LH here) and posted for the viewing public, and antics like this are pretty commonplace. Also commonplace: Bill and Lanette bantering in footnote-style dev notes. 
> 
> Finally, all of the asks were sent in by actual readers of the aforementioned blog. A huge thanks goes out to everyone who submitted these asks and helped craft the story. Literally none of this would exist without you, and I love and appreciate every one of you eternally. :D <3
> 
> Hokay, folks! You're caught up! Have fun!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Video begins with a close-up of LH. Camera shakes before she backs away to reveal BILL’S LAB. A set of teleporter pods stand against the back wall. BILL stands facing them, hands on his hips, beside a panel halfway between the camera and the pods; LH joins him a few seconds later. She leans down and begins typing on a keyboard on the panel.]_

**BILL:**  
Is it up?

 **LH:**  
Running. _[pause]_ Are you sure you want to record this?

 **BILL:**  
It’ll be easier to transmit this way. Besides, I’ve always recorded my experiments like this. You never know what might come in handy later. Trust me. _[looks at her]_ Now, you know what to do, right?

_[LH reaches into a pocket on her skirt and pulls out a vial of an unidentified green liquid.]_

**LH:**  
Load the sample. Wait for your signal. Hit the button.

 **BILL:**  
And that’s why I trust you. _[claps hands together]_ Okay—showtime. Wish me luck.

_[LH rises to her full height.]_

**LH:**  
Wait.

 **BILL:**  
Hmm? You’re not having second thoughts, are you?

 **LH:**  
What? No! I—aren’t you the one who’s supposed to have second thoughts?

 **BILL:**  
Well, not in this case. _[shrugs, faces the teleporter]_ Remember, Lanette. I’ve built this system myself. Of course I trust it. The likelihood of something going horrendously wrong is… _[pause]_ Well, the important thing is there’s at least a 90% chance that if anything happens, I can easily reverse it. 

**LH:**  
What about the 10%?

 **BILL, quickly:**  
Don’t worry about it. Anyway! Off I go!

 **LH:**  
Wait!

_[BILL stops and swings around to face her.]_

**BILL:**  
You are having second thoughts.

 **LH:**  
N-no. I mean … I-I just thought…

 **BILL:**  
Yes?

 **LH:**  
You’re not going in there like that, are you?

_[BILL looks down at himself.]_

**BILL:**  
Like what?

_[LH turns just enough for her expression of deep concern to be visible.]_

**LH:**  
Y-you know. Like that. Clothed.

 **BILL:**  
You want me to undress in front of you?

 **LH:**  
No! I mean … would that— _[motions to BILL]_ —cause any problems?

 **BILL:**  
No. Should it? It hasn’t before.

 **LH:**  
But … according to the laws of physics, you … where do your clothes go? I mean, do they—

 **BILL:**  
Oh, I get it. You’re stalling.

_[BILL walks over and puts both his hands on LH’s shoulders.]_

**BILL:**  
Listen. Lanette. I don’t normally like to admit this, but I’ve done this before. I’ll be fine, all right? I’ll come out of there in one piece, mentally the same Bill you’ve always known. I’ll spend a week like that, and then, we’ll come back here, and with you manning the controls, I’ll be back to my old self again. You’ll see. Just relax, okay? _[presses her chin with the side of an index finger]_ It’ll make the transition easier for the both of us. Promise me you’ll relax.

_[beat]_

**LH, nodding:**  
Okay. I’ll relax.

 **BILL:**  
Atta girl.

_[BILL moves to one of the teleporters and steps inside. While holding the door open, he leans back out.]_

**BILL:**  
Okay, load it!

_[LH takes a deep breath and loads the vial into a slot by the keyboard.]_

**LH:**  
Armed. Waiting for your signal.

 **BILL:**  
Right. _[closes the door]_ Go!

_[LH hits a button. Both doors of the teleporter clang—locked and ready. The windows within each door fill with light, and the whole mechanism whirs to life. It’s not a roar or anything spectacular—just an increasingly loud whir laced with a hiss and the crackle of electricity. LH looks up and watches, her body tense while the lights of the teleporter flash. And then, half a minute later, the whole thing bangs, and both doors clang open to release a cloud of steam or smoke. LH stumbles back, then catches herself. After another pause, she runs to stand in front of the teleporter.]_

**LH, through coughing:**  
Bill? Bill! Are you—are you okay?!

_[A shape crawls out of one of the teleporter’s pods. LH takes a quick step forward, then a hesitant one. The shape rises up onto its haunches, and the smoke clears enough to reveal a flygon standing before the teleporter. It blinks, then fixes its eyes on LH, stretches its wings, and roars. LH backs away, but the flygon drops to all fours and crawls towards her.]_

**LH, quietly:**  
B-Bill?

_[The flygon rises to its hind legs again, stares down at her … then presses one set of foreclaws to its face and laughs.]_

**BILL:**  
Blazes! I hope the camera got the look on your face!

 **LH, instantly serious:**  
Will of the Titans, Bill. You’re stupidly impossible sometimes, you know that?

 **BILL:**  
Sorry. Sorry. I couldn’t resist.

_[LH starts towards the camera]_

**LH:**  
Yes, well, if you’re done messing around, how do you feel? Everything … I don’t know. Everything feels fine, right?

_[BILL leans forward and stretches his wings again]_

**BILL:**  
Perfectly so. Or, well, all things considered. 

**LH, a little gentler now:**  
What do you mean?

_[BILL shifts his eyes to look at her]_

**BILL:**  
I mean, it feels a little strange being something taller and heavier than my human self for once. And something with working wings, too! I wonder if—

 **LH, off screen:**  
Wait! Bill! Don’t—

_[BILL flaps his wings, generating a gust of wind and sand that kicks up papers and debris around him. LH shrieks, and the camera goes flying.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	2. Bill only knows one way to enter a room, and it’s the extra way.

> **tacoman1320x asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH Have you two made it to Galar yet? If so, I hope you had a safe trip. Anything interesting happen on the way?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH sets up the camera on a rock. She steps back to reveal a part of the Wild Area. It’s a grassy field with a single tree nearby; at the foot of the tree is a red backpack. She is currently wearing a coat, and given the fact that she rubs her arms as she steps back to stand under the tree, it’s evident that she’s not used to the cold.]_

**LH:**  
We did! It wasn’t too bad, I admit. I haven’t flown in years, and going through the airport by myself was a little nerve-wracking, never mind … actually flying.

_[She sits down beneath the tree.]_

**LH:**  
As for Bill … sad to say, due to his size and certain laws about what pokémon can fly in an airplane, he’s been spending the majority of the day inside a poké ball.

_[She reaches into her coat pocket to draw a poké ball out.]_

**LH:**  
I feel a little bad about this, honestly. I mean … he was eager to try this thing out, but it’s… _[looks at the camera]_ Well, I stuck my best friend in a poké ball. I know that you technically do that with your best pokémon friend, but how many of them have you had deep, philosophical conversations about the universe with and had them understand? _[clicks the ball to enlarge it]_ Anyway, I have the footage of that if anyone wants it. In the meantime, though, I should probably let him out.

_[pause]_

**LH:**  
But, um, the journey was pretty uneventful other than that, thank you for asking. Just a quick flight, then a quick taxi drive to a hotel, then… _[smiles at the camera]_ Okay, maybe I’m enjoying the quiet a little bit. _[pause, then looks at the ball]_ Stalling for the sake of being impossible because I think it’s funny? Oh gods, I’ve been spending too much time around Bill.

_[She opens the ball. BILL appears in a flash … only on all fours and gasping dramatically at LH’s feet.]_

**BILL:**  
Oh. Oh blazes. How many hours was I in there?!

_[LH looks down at him.]_

**LH:**  
Are you okay?

_[BILL props his head on a set of claws and curls his tail up.]_

**BILL:**  
Quite lovely, actually. It felt a little weird to be converted to data, though. Like going to sleep, only I could still hear everything going on outside.

**LH, stiffly:**  
E-everything?

**BILL:**  
Mm-hmm.

_[Pause, followed by LH clearing her throat and reaching for the backpack.]_

**LH:**  
So! Lunch?

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_


	3. “We finish each other’s—” “—sandwiches!”

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Hello, Bill and Lanette! I'm Laurel, a grad student who's starting out in Galar soon, and I hope to see you there! (laurelsresearchbase)

We hope to see you too! Please reach out if you’d like to meet at some point.  
—LH (because Bill apparently can’t type with claws)

* * *

> **tirien66 replied to your post “Hello, Bill and Lanette! I’m Laurel, a grad student who’s starting out…”**  
>  This means that we’ve finally silenced Bill.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

[Same scene. BILL is now sitting beside LH, who’s still rummaging through the backpack. He, meanwhile, is reading comments on her phone.]

**BILL:**  
Hey! Just because I’m not yet used to typing on a tiny keyboard with these claws doesn’t mean I’m completely silenced!

**LH:**  
Now now.

_[LH pulls out a clear plastic box full of sandwiches.]_

**LH:**  
Don’t blame the keyboard.

_[LH pops open the box while Bill grumbles something unintelligible.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  If Bill can speak common as a Fligon despite having a Fligon's anatomy and, therefore, vocal cords, does that mean that i could teach my Fligon to speak common too? :0

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH eats a sandwich with one hand and holds up the phone for the both fo them to read with the other. BILL is likewise reading the blog and eating a sandwich.]_

**LH:**  
That’s a weird thought. How _are_ you speaking right now? You sound _exactly_ like you do when you’re human, and your mouth? Is definitely not human, let’s just say.

**BILL:**  
Well, the simplest answer is that not all of my physiology is a flygon’s. I’m half human, remember? Some parts of me—such as vocal cords, for example—might be a little closer to human than you’d think.

**LH, a little disturbed:**  
Uh. What … what other parts of you are human?

_[BILL pops the rest of the sandwich into his mouth and chews while looking skyward.]_

**BILL:**  
You know, I’m not sure. Remind me to do an internal scan before I change back. I’m curious.

_[LH looks at him with a horrified expression. Oblivious, Bill reaches for another sandwich.]_

**BILL:**  
Anyway, my personal physiology is irrelevant to this question. The truth is that any pokémon could indeed learn Common, as they’re far more adaptable than, well … you’d think. There are even stories of a particularly dedicated meowth overcoming a far different mouth than mine currently to teach himself Common, without any previous background in it. Of course, those are only stories.

_[He takes a bite of his next sandwich.]_

**BILL:**  
Still, given what other fantastic things pokémon are capable of, I wouldn’t put it past them to learn. Common is a universal language, after all.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  Bill, do foods taste different as a Flygon? And Lanette, what's your favorite physical aspect of your new Flygon research partner?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

**BILL:**  
A bit, I should say. It may have something to do with my sense of smell: it’s a lot more sensitive in this form than it was as a human. _[points to his mouth]_ But the catch is that I smell with my tongue now. It’s … perhaps best not to think about it too much.

_[He reaches down to check for more sandwiches, only to find that the box is empty. LH hands him an apple instead, which he examines carefully.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, besides that, I admit meat tastes a little more appealing than anything else right now. It may be because I’m technically supposed to be carnivorous, being a flygon and all. I don’t think eating fruits or vegetables will hurt me, exactly; it’s just that meat tastes so much better in this form. It’s difficult to describe, but … it’s like looking at a vivid painting by one of the Kalosean masters after starting out a dirty window.

**LH:**  
Please … please stop describing food.

**BILL, smiling:**  
But of course.

_[He bites into the apple while LH gives him a weird look. She then looks at the phone and hesitates.]_

**LH:**  
Uh, physical aspect? Well … to be honest, I’ve always wanted to train a flygon. They’re probably my favorite dragon-types. Powerful. Sleek. Not to mention cuter than salamence, if no one minds me saying so. But when it comes to Bill’s physical aspects… 

_[They exchange glances.]_

**LH:**  
Probably the wings.

**BILL:**  
Ah, you think so too? _[stretches his wings]_ I can’t wait to use—

**LH:**  
Don’t you dare!

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Good news! Flygon has officially been added to the Dragon Egg Group! About time if you ask me.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

**BILL:**  
I always thought it was strange that they were grouped under Bug until now. They’re insectoid, sure, but they’re not bugs.

_[LH looks up from her phone.]_

**LH:**  
How does a pokémon just completely change what it can breed with?

**BILL:**  
Pokémon are wondrous creatures capable of all sorts of fascinating things.

_[LH looks at him, then sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose.]_

**LH:**  
You know what? I’ll … I’ll go with that.

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH! Hey Bill! What was it like in the pokeball? I always imagined it would be pretty cozy.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

**BILL:**  
It was quite strange. Cozy? A bit, yes. Lanette put me in a basic poké ball, but I can see how a luxury or something similar could be cozier.

**LH:**  
If that was a hint…

**BILL:**  
Of course not! Anyway, a poké ball. Imagine your bedroom, only you can’t see the furniture. It’s still familiar and still comfortable, even though you’re simply … floating. That’s what it feels like emotionally. Physically, I can still feel my body, but I can’t really perceive it, if that makes sense. I can’t see it, but I can still feel my arms and legs. And half the room is more like a window, and I can sort of see outside. But it’s a bit blurry, and it’s difficult to tell what time it is or how much time has passed. It almost feels like I’m asleep in all ways except in terms of sound perception. I can still hear everything going on outside without a problem. And I realize that sounds very disorienting, but … somehow it isn’t. It’s difficult to explain. I don’t mind it, exactly, but that may just be the pokémon in me talking.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	4. Do a flip!

> **mushroomfusion245 asked:**  
>  This is the first time you’ve been a Pokémon that can fly right? (Unless Clefairy counts) Try flying!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[The camera is no longer on a stable surface—likely being held by LH, as all that’s visible is BILL standing a few feet away in a field. This is confirmed in the next moment by LH’s voice coming from just off-screen.]_

**LH:**  
Are you sure you’re ready for this? I mean, I think they’re right. Or … you couldn’t fly as a clefairy, could you?

_[BILL grinds his hind claws into the ground. He’s looking down, at the grass, while he stretches his wings behind him. He tests his wings by flapping them, hovering a foot above the ground, and setting himself back down again; he does this a couple of times while he speaks.]_

**BILL:**  
No. I could float, but I don’t suppose that would be the same thing. I think I’ve got this, though.

**LH:**  
A-are you sure? You don’t have to do this, you know.

**BILL:**  
No, no. I’m curious. Besides, oftentimes, I’d have access to the basics of my powers right off the bat.

**LH:**  
What does that mean?

**BILL:**  
It means that if there’s something that should be second-nature to the pokémon whose form I’ve taken, it will come easily to me.

**LH:**  
What about that time you lost control of Metronome and set fire to your curtains as a clefairy?

**BILL, pointing to her with a claw:**  
That was different. Learned skill versus natural power. Flying should be a natural power. I think.

**LH:**  
Bill, please don’t do anything that would break your neck. I can’t—

**BILL, holding his paw up, palm out:**  
Relax. I think I’ve got it.

_[BILL shoves off the ground forcefully and flaps his wings at the height of his jump. His body jerks a little, but then, he shoots higher. He hoots loudly, causing LH to shout in shock, just before he swoops down into an elaborate flight pattern consisting of swoops, sharp rises, and falls. At first, these swoops are shaky, as if at any moment, BILL would plummet into the ground, but gradually, they even out and grow higher until he soars overhead. LH angles the camera up but soon loses track of him, but in the next moment, she abruptly angles the camera down, just in time to see BILL swoop beside her and land on his feet, sliding backwards a few meters to a stop.]_

**BILL, panting:**  
Well. That answers that question.

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **askvoidbearandfriends asked:**  
>  Do a flip, Bill! (Also if you can take a picture of a Flapple)

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL smirks at LH, then takes a step back. He pushes off the ground, flaps his wings to gain a little height, and does a mid-air backflip before landing on his feet again.]_

**BILL:**  
Sadly, we haven’t yet encountered a flapple.

**LH:**  
Yet.

_[BILL glances at a burrow in the distance.]_

**LH:**  
Could we at least wait until tomorrow before you do anything stupider than flying around despite having not flown before?

**BILL:**  
Hey, I didn’t break my neck, did I?

**LH:**  
Still. I don’t even have a dynamax band yet. It might not be a good idea to send you off into a raid against something as powerful as a flapple right away.

**BILL:**  
Ah, true. Luckily, I’ve called in a favor or few. We’ll just need to get you to Professor Magnolia.

**LH:**  
Okay. But…

**BILL, grins at her:**  
Relax. We’ll go tomorrow.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	5. Bill teaches a corviknight about the values of Marxism.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Ask a Corviknight how often they say "Nevermore,"

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Shot of a city roughly mid-morning—specifically, a CORVIKNIGHT perched on a concrete perch in front of a brick building.]_

**BILL, just off-camera:**  
Excuse me! I hope you don’t find this offensive, but I have to ask: how often do you say “nevermore”?

_[The CORVIKNIGHT leans towards the camera for a second, clicking its break and growling in apparent thought. Then, it raises its head and begins cawing rapidly. Every so often, BILL would respond with “mm-hmm” or “I see,” but at specific times (noted below), he would respond with something a little more substantial.]_

**BILL, 10 seconds in:**  
Oh, yes, of course not.

**BILL, at 1:45:**  
Ah, I’m really sorry to hear that.

**BILL, at 2:14:**  
Oh? No, I haven’t heard of that.

**BILL, at 5:24:**  
No, no, it’s an excellent idea! You should absolutely talk to the other corviknight.

**BILL, at 6:01:**  
Oh, sure, it’s a bit intimidating, but once you get started, it’ll get easier.

**BILL, at 6:40:**  
Huh. I can see that.

_[At 7:12, LH approaches, just off the edge of the shot.]_

**BILL, at 7:20:**  
No, you’re not holding us up at all! But certainly!

**BILL, at 8:05:**  
Ah! Thank you! I’ll tell her. It was nice meeting you, and good luck!

_[The CORVIKNIGHT squawks and salutes. The camera shifts as BILL hands it to LH. They begin to walk down the street.]_

**LH:**  
You could understand that?

**BILL:**  
Every word. He’s a really nice guy.

**LH:**  
Bill … I don’t know if you should be speaking Common out in the open like this. What if someone saw you?

**BILL:**  
The funny thing about people is that after a certain level of weirdness, they stop paying attention to the weird things. No one saw me. Besides, it’s just a pair of pokémon talking to each other.

**LH:**  
I … don’t think any of that logic checks out. Just be careful, okay? Who knows if Galar has anything like Team Rocket?

_[BILL gives her a serious look, then sighs.]_

**BILL:**  
All right. You don’t have to worry.

**LH:**  
Thank you. _[pause]_ So … what did that corviknight tell you, anyway?

**BILL:**  
Oh, not much. He doesn’t really say “nevermore” all that often, it’s actually a little offensive to their species to assume that they do, he feels that corviknight are treated unfairly in this region, he and his fellow corviknight are thinking of unionizing, he’s afraid of speaking up about that, he’s also thinking of quitting his job to become the first corviknight pop singer, and by the way if we’re going to spend any more time in Galar, we absolutely must go to Bridge Field because the sights there are just spectacular. Oh, and because I’ve encouraged him to talk to his fellow corviknight and get over what is possibly stage fright with regards to both organizing a union and becoming a pop singer, he’ll put in a word, and you may be able to ride any of the corviknight for free. I might have been essentially adopted by corviknight; I’m not quite sure.

_[LH stops dead in her tracks but doesn’t respond. BILL walks a few more steps forward and glances back at her.]_

**BILL:**  
Have you had breakfast yet? I’m absolutely famished.

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_


	6. Okay, but hear me out: Patisserie Week is the best week of British Bake-Off.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Hey you two! Galarian native here - glad the embargo is finally lifted. Big fan! Absolutely reccomend checking out the confectionary stands in Motostoke. If you have a sweet tooth you haven't lived until you've eaten some of the stuff we make with the help of Alcremie. Cream cheeses too! They come in... I think twenty-eight varieties? Would love to know your thoughts on them and their pre-evolution, Milcery, too!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Shot of a pastry case lined with all sorts of elaborate pastries.]_

**LH, just off-screen:**  
Just so you know, I’m never leaving this place.

_[BILL growls, flygon-like, off-screen. The camera turns to show him standing by a table. On the table are two plates—one with a puff covered in cream cheese and fresh berries and the other with a bagel topped with a sausage. Between these plates are two cups of tea. One of these clearly had cream added. LH moves to the table and places the camera beside the plate with the puff. BILL struggles to seat himself across from her and reaches for the sausage with his claws.]_

**LH, picking up the puff:**  
Kalos-style cream puff with Galarian cream and fresh rawst berries! It’s like a work of art!

**BILL, whispering:**  
How do you eat that much cream?

**LH:**  
Don’t judge me just because you’re genetically cursed.

_[LH takes a bite, then visibly slumps in her seat out of joy.]_

**LH, through a mouthful:**  
Oh yeah. That’s good. _[normally]_ So. Alcremie.

**BILL:**  
What about alcremie?

**LH:**  
I think I’m going to need one.

**BILL:**  
You … want a pokémon made of cream that can turn into a giant pile of cream?

_[LH smiles at him and takes another bite.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Lanette, stop stressing out and just enjoy your vacation, hun! You and McKenzie deserve a break.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**LH:**  
You know … maybe they’ve got a point. If the way this day is starting is any indication, maybe there’s a lot more to this region than I thought. I should definitely, definitely just relax.

**BILL, still whispering:**  
Okay, but you do know that alcremie is a fairy-type, and the only pokémon you have right now is of the dragon-type, yes?

**LH, whispering back:**  
Just relax, Bill. We’re on vacation.

_[She raises her eyebrows at him and takes a sip of her tea.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_


	7. Maybe stop touching the pointy bits?

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Have you tried battling yet? What moves can you do?

> **fattymccatcat said:**  
>  Have you tried using any moves yet?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Wild Area again. This time, LH stands in front of a burrow, her hand wrapped around a bracelet on her right wrist.]_

**LH:**  
You know … it scares me a little just what those “connections” of yours can get you. Like a magic stone, for instance, just for saying I know you.

**BILL, off-screen:**  
For research purposes, of course.

_[He hands her the camera.]_

**LH:**  
Does anyone actually believe you when you tell them that?

**BILL:**  
No idea. Never thought to ask.

_[BILL walks forward, towards the burrow. He stretches his wings and leans down, claws gripping both sides of the burrow’s edge.]_

**LH:**  
Are you sure you’re ready? I mean … Metronome. Fire. Curtains.

_[BILL takes a deep breath.]_

**BILL:**  
Dragon Claw, Bug Buzz, Earthquake, Sandstorm. _[looks back at her]_ I think that’s what I’ve got. I can definitely feel powerful elemental energy. I just need to give it a shot.

_[BILL reaches back with one of his claws, as if to offer a hand to LH.]_

**BILL:**  
What do you say? Want to help me out with this?

_[LH hesitates, then takes BILL by the hand. The both of them jump into the den—the world whirls around the camera, then darkens as LH and the camera drop towards a rock floor. At the last second, something pulls her up and sets her down gently; BILL lands in front of her a second later. The camera angles up to reveal, several meters ahead, a giant budew rocking back and forth on its feet. It cries out and takes a step forward.]_

**LH:**  
Well. There’s something you don’t see every day. Are you sure you’re ready for this?

_[BILL hesitates. Then, he throws his claws out to the side. They begin to glow bright violet. He looks down at them, then back at LH. And then, he smiles.]_

**BILL:**  
Let’s set fire to some curtains, shall we?

_[BILL pushes off the ground and rockets towards the budew.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  (wait crap I forgot to put swsh launch in the ask, please disregard previous version) [SWSH LAUNCH] Have you tried out Dynamax yet? Wonder what it'd feel like to be suddenly building-sized.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[The camera follows BILL as he’s thrown backwards, across the field, until he crashes into a rock formation. Yes, he’s screaming the entire time. He drops to the ground and rolls across the ground, then crawls forward until he’s crouching on the ground next to LH. LH sets the camera on a rock, then reaches into her bag for an antidote, which she sprays on a wound on BILL’s shoulder.]_

**LH:**  
Three Dragon Claws in a row, all with the same result.

**BILL, wincing:**  
Not quite. This one poisoned me. _[sucks in a breath]_ It’s a budew. How does it hurt that much?

**LH:**  
Maybe stop trying to touch the pointy bits.

_[BILL pushes himself up and chuckles.]_

**BILL:**  
You know, normally, I think all pokémon are our friends, but this … this I’m going to use Earthquake on. Repeatedly.

**LH:**  
Or… _[holds up her wrist]_ You can finally let me use that little gift you had Professor Magnolia give me. You’re not afraid to use this, are you?

_[Pause.]_

**LH:**  
You forgot I had this, didn’t you?

**BILL:**  
I got caught up—

**LH and BILL, simultaneously:**  
—in the moment.

_[LH smiles. BILL looks at her for a long while, then pushes himself back to his feet.]_

**BILL:**  
Okay. Let’s use it.

_[LH stands and adjust the bracelet.]_

**LH:**  
Okay. The moment you come back out, use Max Wyrmwind. Got it?

**BILL:**  
Got it.

_[LH recalls BILL into his poké ball, then holds the ball out to the side. It begins to glow, shortly before a giant poké ball of light wraps around it. She hurls this out with both hands, and it pops open, releasing a silhouetted flygon. This silhouette suddenly enlarges once, then twice, then roars, just as it had in the Sea Cottage. BILL emerges, now just as large as the budew, and without skipping a beat, he flaps his wings, generating a blast of wind and violet light that rips across the battlefield and wraps around the budew. Dragon wings burst from the ground and slice upwards, blasting the budew into the whirlwind above it. The budew bellows and whirls on the air before coming crashing down again._

_Two sets of claws drop and rest on either side of LH, and BILL leans down, placing his head beside her.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette, I think it’s weak enough to catch.

_[LH looks at him, then smiles. She pulls a ball out of her pocket and taps it with her bracelet, causing it to be engulfed in an orb of light. With both hands, she throws this at the budew. It strikes its side and draws it in, then crashes onto the ground, shakes, and falls still. And then, it shrinks, back down to a normal poké ball. LH walks forward and picks it up, then turns back to look at her partner. BILL smiles, then sits up, looking down at her.]_

**LH:**  
Nice job, by the way.

**BILL:**  
You too. Good call. _[looks up at the mouth of the den]_ So. How do I change back?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	8. "Tell me, Princess, now when did you last let your heart decide?"

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  Flygon are around 6', right? Could Lanette ride Bill? Or would that hinge on him actually knowing Fly?

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH: Bill! Fly Lanette somewhere! Give her a ride!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Outside again. BILL is standing beside the burrow, looking into it—he’s currently back to normal. LH walks the camera a little closer.]_

**LH:**  
Hey. Are you okay?

 **BILL:**  
That. Was weird.

 **LH:**  
Glad to hear you’re not scarred or anything. Was that your first battle?

 **BILL:**  
Yeah. _[grins at her]_ I didn’t do too badly, did I?

 **LH:**  
You did great. And now, little Lacroix will help us catch an alcremie.

 **BILL:**  
You know, _Lacroix_ has a terribly foul mouth.

 **LH:**  
Does he? Huh. Anyway, do you have it in you for one more experiment, or have you had enough excitement for the day?

 **BILL, grinning:**  
That depends. You’re not going to take me to a gym next, are you?

 **LH:**  
Nope.

_[LH grabs onto BILL’s shoulder and hops onto his back.]_

**BILL:**  
H-hey! What are you doing?!

 **LH:**  
The readers want to see if you can fly me somewhere.

 **BILL:**  
What?! Whoa, hey, Lanette. I’m willing to do a lot of things in this form to satisfy the readers’—and our—curiosity, but that? That might not be such a great idea.

 **LH:**  
Huh. I never thought I’d hear you say “that might not be such a great idea.”

 **BILL:**  
I-I’m serious this time.

_[LH leans down to look at BILL’s face.]_

**LH:**  
Gods—you really are, aren’t you? What about setting fire to curtains and all? I mean … you flew yesterday, and you weren’t completely certain you _could_.

 **BILL:**  
Lanette … it’s one thing if it’s just me at risk. I wouldn’t mind doing that to get answers. But this would be putting you in danger too. I’m still new to flying; I don’t know if I can carry anyone’s weight. _[bows his head]_ What if I drop you?

_[LH exhales. The camera shifts until all it catches is a shot of LH’s arm wrapped around BILL’s chest.]_

**LH:**  
You won’t. Here. Wrap your arms around my legs—right, just like that. And I’ll keep my weight centered on your back like this, and then all I’ll need to do is wrap my arm around your neck like this, and … there! I’m secure.

_[Pause. LH sighs, then leans in until her face is visible at the edge of the shot. It appears she’s hugging BILL’s neck.]_

**LH:**  
It’s okay. I trust you. You’re not going to drop me because … you wouldn’t.

_[Another pause. Then, abruptly, the scene beyond LH’s face rises. LH winces, then shifts out of the shot.]_

**BILL:**  
Hold on tight!

_[The camera shifts, and suddenly, before it, there’s the Wild Area, spread out beneath the two as they rise higher and higher away from it. After a few moments, they hover, and then, they dip, swooping down and then soaring forward. The camera rises again, but this time, it’s because LH has apparently sat up as much as she can to film their flight. Green and red forests and verdant fields spread out beneath them, giving way to the brick-and steel cities fringing the shot. The camera pans slowly, from forest to field, until finally, it settles on the horizon. It shifts down a little to settle beside BILL’s head, but it never breaks away from that line in the distance.]_

**LH:**  
It’s beautiful up here.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	9. Dear Diary: I have made a terrible mistake.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Interior of a hotel room. Looks pretty standard—bed, desk, television hanging on a wall—albeit spacious. The bed is very clearly occupied by LH. BILL is sprawled out on a couch on the opposite side of the room, holding the camera in both claws. A light is on over him.]_

**BILL:**  
Okay. Day one, and I must say, it’s been … odd. Normally, I’ve let Lanette document our adventure so far—or, well, I’ve documented parts of it too, once I figured out how to operate this thing with my claws, but, ah. The point is that I’m documenting this now because … there are things I need to chronicle that I can’t quite say in front of Lanette.

_[He holds his head with one of his claws.]_

**BILL:**  
This experience has been more than fascinating. It’s not yet the longest I’ve spent as a pokémon, but this is the longest I’ve been with someone. And I’ve never been captured, either. Needless to say, there’s a whole new layer to this experience that wasn’t there any other time I’ve been … well, that I’ve been a pokémon.

_[BILL sits up, carefully pointing the camera at himself.]_

**BILL:**  
And I think it’s made things a little more complicated. Despite running this blog with Lanette, I’ve realized that I haven’t spent that much time with her in person for, well … years now, I suppose. And that is combining with something—perhaps the pokémon in me, that’s bound to that poké ball—and … I don’t quite know what I’m feeling right now, if I’m honest. I just know that I want to protect her. She’s right; I wouldn’t have recoiled at the idea of flying with her ordinarily. I should keep an eye on this. If what I’m feeling is a flygon’s instincts, then…

_[He looks up, towards the bed.]_

**BILL, relaxing:**  
I must admit, it was fun listening to her on our flight. Sometimes, I worry that I go too far with my jokes, but it was nice to see her smile when we landed.

_[Pause. BILL grows serious, then clears his throat.]_

**BILL:**  
Anyway, today was productive. Experiment with both flight and use of pokémon moves went far better and far less painful than I expected. Still getting used to my senses. _[tongue lashes out to lick his snout a few times; he looks down in slight confusion]_ Especially smell. But we still have a few days left to sort things out. Tomorrow should be quite interesting. We’re starting out with an early-morning flight to southwest Galar to sample … cheese?

_[Pause. BILL turns his head away from the camera.]_

**BILL:**  
Wait, why did I agree to that?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	10. Best thing to do with your lactose intolerant best friend? Bring him to a dairy farm.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Can you please fly to southwestern Galar and tell us if there are any cow Pokémon? My Trainer tells me the region is famous fo cheese and cider... Whatever that is. Do those exist? - storageporygon

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH and BILL are wandering through what appears to be a gift shop. LH is carrying a basket full of wrapped cheese. BILL is holding the camera, as evidenced by his occasional growls, just off screen.]_

**LH:**  
Galar is a bit strange when it comes to miltank. It doesn’t really have wild miltank; all of the ones that live here are strictly bred and owned by the local dairies. According to the locals, there used to be wild miltank populations ages ago, but, well. They simply died out. Or were captured.

_[She plucks a pair of samples from a nearby plate and pops one into her mouth. The other she offers to BILL, whose draconic snort of disgust and judgment can be heard just out of frame. LH smirks and pops the other sample into her mouth.]_

**LH:**  
It’s true, though, that this region’s cheese is fantastic. Not quite as good as, say, Vrijheid or Kalosean cheeses, but they still produce a wide variety of high-quality ones. Stilton, for example. 

_[LH holds up a package of cheese. BILL audibly growls and like a flygon.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **smartguy18 asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH! Heya Bill! Since you're a Flygon now, how do you feel at the moment. And does your senses heighten to a real Flygon level or you still retain your human senses? Examples like eyesight, hearing senses, smell senses, stimulus, reflexes, etc... You know what I mean... I'm curious to know

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Outside. LH is leaning against a wood fence outside of a dairy, watching wooloo wander around a field. BILL stands a few feet away. He swings the camera away from her and to himself.]_

**BILL:**  
How am I feeling…? If I’m honest? Queasy after that experience. 

_[He exhales.]_

**BILL:**  
But seriously, it’s been unusual. I’ve talked a bit about smell and taste, but other senses are entirely different experiences. Touch seems to be unaffected, although I’ve noticed I’m more sensitive to cold. Or, rather, cold bothers me more. Otherwise, you would think my sense of touch would be dulled because I have scales instead of skin, but somehow, it’s no different from my sense of touch as a human. Sight, meanwhile—that is entirely different. It’s sharper in that I can see things at a distance—even the smallest morpeko from the sky. I apparently have night-vision as well. The trade-off is that I’m completely colorblind.

_[He waves claws in front of his face.]_

**BILL:**  
Completely monochromatic. Luckily, perhaps, given the lenses over my eyes. It’s still jarring. Uncomfortable too; there’s an entire category of experiences I’m sadly missing right now. Clearly, I’ll need to come back when I’m fully human.

_[He sits down beside the fence.]_

**BILL:**  
Other than that … reflexes do indeed seem sharper, and in general, I feel stronger and more energetic. To be fair, I probably am, but it’s quite nice to feel stronger than I was as a human. And on that note, physically? I feel great. I should have tried becoming a final-stage pokémon ages ago.

_[BILL leans back against the fence, then turns his head. His smile falters a little as he looks at LH.]_

**BILL:**  
Emotionally, however … things are still complicated. I’m still keeping an eye on that, don’t worry.

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **nt1274 asked:**  
>  has Bill ever been to Galar before as a human?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as above, only this time, LH is sitting beside BILL with her phone between them.]_

**BILL:**  
My father took my family here when I was very young, supposedly to teach us about his ancestral culture. I barely remember it, I admit, and I think we largely stayed in Wyndon. _[shrugs]_ Either way, I’d like to come back as both a human and an adult. I know I would appreciate it more.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  Bill doing Flygon things is rather cute. Though, how long have you stayed a Pokemon before? Is there a risk of "going feral" to an extent if you don't turn back soon enough, like in the Animorphs (can't think of a good Pokepun) books?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, although LH is clearly packing her bag, and the two of them are getting ready to go. The camera is sitting on the fence, apparently.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, now that I can’t exactly hide it, the longest I’ve been was perhaps that time I was stuck as a clefairy. That lasted for about a month before someone finally came along and agreed to help me out. _[pause]_ He wasn’t the first one who came along, but I might have gotten distracted by the actual first. In my defense, was I really supposed to pass up an opportunity to share a bit of my collection and enthusiasm with Professor Oak’s grandson? I only find it odd that he didn’t say anything about a talking clefairy.

**LH, slinging her bag on:**  
Uh, Bill? You know I don’t mind your tangents normally, but if we’re going to get to Hammerlocke…

**BILL:**  
Right. Sorry. _[turns and stretches his wings]_ There isn’t a risk of going feral, as far as I know. Granted, there’s always a first time for everything, but that’s why I’ve gone with a “low dose” of flygon genes, as it were. That is, I’m not merged with a full flygon, which means I don’t have to wrestle control over this body away from anything. The danger is if I get too carried away, but I’ve had plenty enough training that I don’t think that would be a problem.

_[He walks a little closer to the camera. As he does so, he leans down a little.]_

**BILL, whispering to the camera:**  
That’s about it mentally. Physically, though … I admit there’s always a risk that I won’t come back fully human, and the likelihood of that is a lot higher than I let Lanette believe earlier. I would never do this if I didn’t think it’s safe or if that risk were too considerable. But I won’t lie and say it’s not something I think about.

**LH:**  
Bill? Are you okay?

**BILL:**  
Hmm? Oh! Yes! Just a moment!

_[He grabs the camera, and the footage ends abruptly.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Swish event! Lanette, there's actually a Pokedoll Shop, I believe somewhere in Hammerlocke? It's called Build-a-Cubchoo Workshop, go check it out sometime!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH and BILL are walking along a cobblestone street, through a city made of dark brick. LH is holding a sobble plush wearing a sports jersey.]_

**BILL:**  
Never leaving this place either?

**LH:**  
Let me have this moment. _[cuddles the plush]_ You know, though … I’ve been thinking about what you said this morning, about how you were here years ago but don’t remember much about this place. I don’t think you’ve ever told me that.

**BILL:**  
Oh. I don’t suppose I have; it’s not really something that would come up in conversation.

**LH:**  
No, I mean … it’s been a long time since we’ve had a chance to catch up, you know? And even then, it’s difficult to get you to talk about something other than business sometimes.

**BILL, a little quieter:**  
Sorry. You know how I am.

**LH:**  
I’m not trying to accuse you of— _[exhales]_ I think what I’m trying to say is … we’re about halfway through this trip, and we’ve been focusing on either studying what being a pokémon is like or fulfilling these suggestions from our readers. Maybe, just for a few hours, we should turn off the camera and do something for ourselves. Maybe … I don’t know. Get to know your ancestors a little?

**BILL:**  
What did you have in mind?

_[Pause.]_

**LH:**  
Why don’t we start with Wyndon?

_[END TRANSMISSION.]_

* * *

> **rebecca-lotto-mage-of-breath asked:**  
>  dang ! i was hoping you'd be a pumpkaboo! but flygon is cool too bill. did'ya meet leon yet? i heard his sense of direction is as horrible as his fashion sense

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL and LH are sitting in the stands of a stadium, watching a trainer battle between a LEON’s charizard and an opponent’s corviknight. The camera lingers on the battle for a second—the charizard using Flamethrower while the corviknight dodges—before it swings up to LH. She’s watching the battle intently, her chin resting on her clasped hands.]_

**BILL, whispering just loud enough for the camera to pick up on:**  
Not directly, no. Sad to say, I don’t have the right connections for a personal meeting. It’s probably for the best; Lanette apparently has a thing for champions.

**LH:**  
Shh!

**BILL:**  
What is it with you and champions anyway? Close, personal friendships with Steven and Wallace, an admiration for Cynthia, a full collection of Diantha’s films—

**LH, low and through clenched teeth:**  
They’re great trainers. Besides, I don’t have a thing for every champion.

**BILL:**  
Name one.

**LH:**  
Lance.

_[Pause. There’s a bang, followed by a charizard’s roar and an eruption of cheers from the crowd.]_

**BILL:**  
No one has a thing for Lance.

_[LH rolls her eyes and grins.]_

**LH:**  
Anyway, you’re one to talk, Mr. Redheads.

_[BILL makes an odd, choking noise.]_

**LH:**  
That said, we’re supposed to be on break. Relax, okay?

_[LH reaches for the camera.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  So! Bill, Lannette. You two, uh. Seen our fossil Pokemon?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Outside of the stadium, at a nearby cafe, BILL and LH are sitting at a table by the window. (Wyndon Stadium can be seen a few blocks away, across streets lined with old, European-style buildings.) There is a cup of coffee in front of LH and a glass of water and a sandwich in front of BILL. The camera is on the table in front of them both; BILL is seated next to LH, leaning over her arm to look at her phone.]_

**LH:**  
Apparently, you can combine different fossils to produce different pokémon. These are actually full-scale species that existed in the wild millions of years ago, yet somehow, modern revival techniques require combining genetic information from multiple unrelated sources to produce the same pokémon. The going theory is that these aren’t exactly the four extinct species in question but rather close approximations based on available genetic material, much like how the modern-day Pyrenean ibex is not an actual pure Pyrenean ibex but rather a combination of ibex DNA and modern domestic goat. It’s just that pokémon fossil revival techniques allow us to rely only on genetic material from fossils, rather than a combination of preserved material and modern-day genetic relatives. [looks up from her phone] That doesn’t sound ethical.

**BILL:**  
I have ideas.

**LH, putting her phone face-down on the table:**  
You should not.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Sword shield event! Try not to run into the local mafia, eh? We're lucky enough to not have anything the likes of Team Rocket or Team Galactic, but there have been some, ahem, scuffles lately.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
Ah, Team Yell? _[winces]_ They remind me of my fans. Luckily, though, they only seem to bother people thinking of taking the gym challenge, which neither of us are.

_[LH picks up her cup as BILL explains the above, but she stops with the cup at her lips when he mentions they aren’t interested in the gym challenge.]_

**BILL, realizing the above:**  
Hey! Aren’t you the one who told me I should avoid evil teams?

**LH:**  
The ones that catch rare pokémon for use in their nefarious schemes, yes. An ordinary band of kids who are really enthusiastic about a trainer, no.

**BILL, looking at her oddly:**  
Does this mean you’re interested in the gym challenge?

**LH:**  
Don’t tell me you’re shying away from a new experience.

**BILL:**  
I’m not, actually. I just thought you wouldn’t want me to battle another trainer after that last one. If you were thinking of it, then it would be interesting to see if I fared any better in a gym challenge on the field itself as opposed to the trainer’s box.

**LH, grinning:**  
Don’t sell yourself too short. Anyway, perhaps. I mean, so long as there isn’t another eevee, I’m sure we’ll be fine. 

_[She takes a sip of her coffee. Meanwhile, BILL glowers at her.]_

**BILL:**  
Hey, it wasn’t my fault that trainer knew my only weakness.

**LH:**  
They did not, but good try.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	11. Adventures in Tourism (Also, we broke Raihan.)

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Yo Billgon, I heard a high pitched squee that sounded like one of those “heard around the world/across the depths of space/through time” things, im guessing you discovered your first Gigantomaxed Eevee? :V

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION #1]_

_[Sometime earlier that day: On a battlefield. The camera is resting on the floor, angling up, several meters behind BILL and LH. The two of them stand on one end of the field; a giant EEVEE and another trainer stand on the other. BILL’s claws are covering his mouth, and he’s staring up at the eevee.]_

**BILL, whispering loudly:**  
_It’s so fluffy._

**LH, snapping back:**  
Yes. Great. Now get in your poké ball and let me dynamax you if you want to live.

_[END TRANSMISSION #1]_

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION #2]_

_[The cafe again. LH is staring into the camera with an exhausted look on her face.]_

**LH:**  
Yes. And Bill was nearly crushed to death by it.

**BILL:**  
Come on, Lanette! It was my dream come true! Cuddled to death by a giant eevee!

_[END TRANSMISSION #2]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  What do TM's do to you when you are a pokemon? Also do you know Dig in Flygon form? Tunneling seems like a cool ability to have, you can probably use it for all sorts of things

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH and BILL are standing in the middle of a park—specifically a lawn. LH has a TM reader in hand, which she’s focusing completely on at the moment.]_

**LH:**  
We’ve already gotten him to learn Fly for transportation’s sake, but what else?

_[BILL grasps her wrist and leans over to look at the reader’s screen.]_

**BILL:**  
Hmm. Rock Slide … Giga Drain … Swift … oh, Attract?

**LH:**  
Absolutely not. We should really get some technical records too. You could use Dragon Dance. Or Dragon Pulse.

**BILL:**  
Or Flamethrower.

**LH:**  
Keep dreaming. Oh! Here we go. Dig.

_[She presses a button and steps back to aim the reader at BILL’s forehead.]_

**LH:**  
Ready?

**BILL:**  
Hit me!

_[LH taps the screen of the reader, and it shines a light onto BILL’s face. His eyes glow, and he falls into a trance for a few moments until the reader shuts down. He blinks, then shakes his head and rubs the side of his face.]_

**BILL:**  
Hm. A little more tingly than I was expecting.

**LH:**  
But you’re okay?

**BILL:**  
Yeah, not a problem. Stand back.

_[LH takes another step back. BILL dives onto the ground and buries his claws into the earth, then quickly burrows. He disappears underground in seconds. LH peers into the hole he’s created and grips the TM reader to her chest.]_

**LH:**  
Bill? You okay?

**BILL:**  
Are you kidding? I’ve found a lost city down here! _[pause]_ I’m kidding. I’m pretty sure this is chalk. _[another pause]_ It doesn’t taste like chalk.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Bill! Can you find a man named Raihan and show him you can talk, I'd love to hear about his reaction

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Hammerlocke Stadium—or, more accurately, the vault. RAIHAN stands in front of LH and BILL, with one hand on his hip, sans his students. His rotom phone is here, though, hovering around his head.]_

**RAIHAN:**  
So. You’ve come to challenge the great Raihan’s gym.

**LH:**  
Yes. I hope you don’t mind that I only have one pokémon. The other’s a bit too young to be battling in a gym, sadly.

_[RAIHAN clicks his tongue and rubs his chin in thought. Then, he smirks confidently.]_

**RAIHAN:**  
Sorry. No can do. Galarian gyms are designed to be challenges meant to test a trainer’s strength and skill. As the last gym in the Galarian circuit, the great Raihan’s gym is no place for a trainer whose team isn’t fully prepared. Come back when you have enough pokémon to engage in a double battle.

_[LH opens her mouth, prepared to speak, but before she can—]_

**BILL:**  
Well, that’s a shame.

_[Pause. RAIHAN continues to smirk, but his eyes turn stone-cold as they settle on BILL.]_

**RAIHAN:**  
What.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  have you encountered any other flygon? if so, could they tell that you weren't *really* a flygon?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, but RAIHAN and LH are conversing off in a corner. Their voices are too low for the camera to pick up, but RAIHAN is gesturing to his rotom phone and then to BILL rather emphatically. BILL, meanwhile, is standing close to the camera with RAIHAN’S FLYGON out and making inquisitive growls at him.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, as of now, I have. This is Raihan’s flygon, by the way. He apparently likes sweet poffins, lounging in the sun, and beating up pokémon for Raihan.

_[FLYGON leans closer to BILL, flicks his tongue out, and emits a series of growls and barks.]_

**BILL, leaning back and keeping his eyes on the camera:**  
Apparently, it _is_ obvious that I’m not really a flygon. I “smell weird,” according to them. Well. That and I can talk.

_[FLYGON trills and barks. BILL swivels his head head towards him.]_

**BILL:**  
What? Absolutely not!

_[FLYGON growls inquisitively.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, yes, I’m curious, but … with _Thunder Punch_?

_[Across the room, LH crosses her arms, and RAIHAN grips his head in a desperate gesture.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **nt1274 asked:**  
>  Can other Pokemon tell that you're not technically one of them? After all, you can speak Common, know how to operate a camera, and freak out over large Eevees....

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. FLYGON is more insistent about his line of questioning growls than usual. BILL is leaning away.]_

**BILL:**  
Uh, yes. Besides Raihan’s flygon, I’ve noticed that a number of pokémon Lanette and I have encountered, both in the wild and on the street, act rather oddly around me. Lacroix, Lanette’s new budew, says it’s not even about the fact that I can talk and use a camera. It’s more that I move strangely, like I don’t quite know how to move like a pokémon. And I smell odd, apparently. Like “a human rubbed itself all over me,” according to him. I try not to think about it. Many pokémon we’ve encountered don’t mind interacting with me; if anything, I pique their curiosity. In a good way, I hope.

_[RAIHAN’S FLYGON flicks his tongue at BILL, to which BILL responds by placing his claws on FLYGON’s snout and pushing him away.]_

**BILL:**  
Now, ah, Flygon? I’m flattered that you’re interested, but—

_[LH appears behind him.]_

**LH:**  
Having trouble?

**BILL:**  
Blazes! Oh, Lanette. N-no. Just establishing boundaries.

_[FLYGON barks several times, to which BILL fires a horrified look at him.]_

**BILL:**  
Oi! That’s my trainer you’re talking about!

**LH, clearing her throat:**  
Speaking of which, we’d better go, Bill. We won’t be battling Raihan.

**BILL:**  
Hm? Couldn’t convince him to have a friendly one-on-one match?

**LH:**  
On the contrary. He warmed up to the idea pretty quickly. I just don’t feel like battling him right now. 

_[She smiles sweetly, then saunters up to the camera and grabs it off wherever it had been placed. As it moves, it sweeps across the vault, catching one last shot of RAIHAN, who’s still half-bowed dejectedly in the corner LH had left him.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **mayakit asked:**  
>  SwSh Launch event: Hey Bill, Lanette. I had a question: is there a reason I don't see many pokemon in the stands of the gym stadiums? Asking because a couple of my pokemon are very insterested when the Champion's cup gets broadcasted here in Hoenn. Shamal (my flygon) also says "Hi!"

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[The street outside of Hammerlocke Stadium. BILL and LH are making their way down the streets, almost aimlessly.]_

**BILL, waving a set of claws at the camera:**  
Hello, Shamal!

**LH:**  
And to answer your question, it really depends on the stadium and pokémon. The stadiums traditionally towards the end of a league circuit usually have more exciting battles, which can rile up pokémon. So larger ones end up being confined to their poké balls to avoid any mishaps. Smaller ones can stay if they behave, but it’s often just easier to keep everyone in a poké ball. For gyms earlier in a circuit, battles there tend to be less exciting, so anyone can be out, but oftentimes, it’s just easier for a trainer to keep track of their pokémon if they limit the number sitting with them at a time. All of these aren’t official rules, by the way; it’s just etiquette. Or, well, everyone understanding that if something breaks, they’re the ones who’ll have to fix it.

**BILL:**  
In other words, your pokémon may still attend if they’re not ones to get caught up in the moment, as it were.

**LH:**  
Pretty much, yeah.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **june-brysen replied to your post “have you encountered any other flygon? if so, could they tell that you…”**  
>  …did Flygon ask what I THINK he did..?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as earlier. BILL is looking at the camera with mild horror.]_

**BILL:**  
He asked me if I’ve tried to recharge the camera with Thunder Punch because I know how to use the camera, he’s always wanted to do it with his trainer’s rotom phone, and Raihan— _very wisely_ —told him that’s not how electronics work at all. What … what else could he have asked?!

**LH, raising an eyebrow:**  
I can think of a few things.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  (swish event) So Bill, hear any interesting stuff from the local pokemon that the humans can't hear? How's it compare to back home (assuming you went outside one of the other times you turned into a Pokemon)?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as earlier, but BILL is doing a bit of stretching on the sidewalk—as in, stretching his wings, flexing his tail, generally preparing for flight.]_

**BILL:**  
It’s all less interesting than you’d think. If it’s two pokémon owned by two different trainers meeting up, they’re usually gossiping about their trainers, if not simply bragging to one another about which trainer is better. If it’s a pokémon with a single trainer, then they’re usually asking their trainers to stop at various places or for food or the like. Multiple pokémon from the same trainer will likely be chatting about the city or various strategies. Wild pokémon will be telling off trained ones for invading their territory or communicating with other wild pokémon for the usual basic needs. It’s all fairly common stuff, universal among pokémon. I think, though, that perhaps it’s because Galar is a little more urbanized than Kanto is, but the pokémon in Kanto tend to be a bit more laid back and focused on, well … frolicking than foraging for food or defending territory. Galarian pokémon are typically very eager to battle, whereas Kantonian ones are less aggressive. Then there’s talk of the landmarks. Kantonian pokémon will often talk about routes as places to avoid or go to in order to find trainers; Galarians will say the same of the Wild Area more than anything else. So you see, we all have quite a bit in common with each other, when you get right down to it.

_[He straightens and shakes his entire body.]_

**BILL:**  
There we go. Ready?

_[LH nods and climbs onto his back.]_

**LH:**  
To Glimwood?

**BILL:**  
You got it. And here we go!

_[He leaps into the air, carrying LH with him.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	12. “Bill, you should probably be honest with Lanette.” Haha, *thanks*, anon.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  [SWSH LAUNCH EVENT] I'd absolutely suggest you visit Glimwood Tangle and the town of Ballonlea, except to get to the latter you need to go to through the former it is jam-packed with fairy, psychic types and ghost types, most of whom who love leading people astray. I mean, on top of it being a maze to begin with, really dark other than the bioluminescent mushrooms and Bill currently being part dragon. That being said, you can't really visit us in Galar without paying it a visit at least once.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL lands in a dark wood. The camera sweeps up to catch glimpses of large, glowing mushrooms, surrounded by gently swaying grasses. Every so often, a glowing pokémon skitters across the forest floor, around the mushrooms and into the underbrush. LH dismounts and moves forward, closer to a brilliant, pink cluster of mushrooms.]_

**BILL:**  
Glimwood Tangle. What do you think?

**LH:**  
It’s beautiful. _[turns to BILL and holds up a poké ball]_ Okay. Back in you go.

_[BILL steps back.]_

**BILL:**  
What? Wait. What do you mean?

**LH:**  
Well … this place is home to a lot of fairy-types. It’s not safe for you. Don’t worry; Lacroix can keep an eye on me.

**BILL:**  
Lacroix isn’t experienced. Keep me out. I can use more than just dragon moves.

**LH:**  
Bill—

**BILL:**  
Lanette, I insist. This isn’t the sort of place a human should be without protection. If things go sideways, I can fly us out at the very least, but please. Let me stay out here with you. You’ve seen how aggressive Galarian pokémon can be.

_[Pause.]_

**LH:**  
Okay.

_[BILL relaxes.]_

**LH:**  
One condition, though.

**BILL, tensing:**  
What’s that?

_[LH turns and starts walking. At the edge of the shot, BILL appears, walking beside her. She takes a deep breath.]_

**LH:**  
Let’s talk.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  bill you should probably be honest with lanette. i mean, its not like she can talk you out of it now that you're already a flygon.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**LH:**  
So I saw the videos. Both of them.

**BILL:**  
What videos?

**LH:**  
The ones you made the other day—the one at the dairy and then the one in the hotel. You sent them to yourself, then deleted them, but I saw the logs, restored them, and … watched.

_[Pause. The only sounds are the crunching of leaves and sticks beneath BILL and LH’s feet.]_

**LH:**  
But here’s the thing. I know you. If you actually didn’t want me to see those videos, you would’ve covered your tracks better.

_[BILL laughs nervously.]_

**BILL:**  
These claws, you know.

**LH:**  
Bill, you figured out how to use a touch-screen camera in hours with those same claws. You’re better than that. So … you wanted me to see the videos, didn’t you? But you didn’t know how to tell me about them.

_[Silence, save for the crunching of leaves and sticks.]_

**LH:**  
Just like you didn’t know how to tell me everything that’s in the videos. Am I close?

**BILL:**  
Pretty close, yes.

_[LH stops and exhales. She swings the camera around, then drops her arm. The shot swoops down, and all that can be seen is Glimwood Tangle, upside-down.]_

**LH:**  
So. How high are we talking?

**BILL:**  
Lanette—

**LH:**  
I know what you’re doing. Whenever you don’t want me to worry, you try to play it off as if you have everything under control when you don’t. So please. Just for once … be completely honest with me.

_[Pause.]_

**BILL:**  
All right. Honestly? There’s a 74% chance that I can reverse this transformation without any consequence. I’ve designed the system specifically to separate the flygon from me, but even though it was explicitly built for this, this is still technically a test run. It’s difficult to say what will happen, and the fact that my genetic code has already been altered multiple times, I’m at an increased risk of, well. Not coming back quite right.

**LH:**  
So … this wasn’t safe?

**BILL:**  
No, it is! That’s a 74% chance! Like I said, there are still excellent odds that I’ll be able to reverse this without a problem.

**LH:**  
And if there is a problem? Bill, tell me. Will you die if we—

**BILL:**  
What? No, no, no, no. Lanette, _no_. I wouldn’t do this if I thought that was a possibility.

[LH’s hands shift; BILL is grasping her wrists with both claws.]

**BILL:**  
What I mean is physically, I won’t be … entirely human. If things go wrong. I’ll still be me inside; nothing will change that. It’s just that … I might not look like me. Do you understand?

**LH:**  
But … wouldn’t you be in pain?

**BILL, chuckling:**  
No. Lanette, whatever I’ll be, it’ll be viable. Trust me. It’ll be stable enough for me to look for a more long-term solution.

_[Pause. LH moves, this time to a tree. She sits down and sets the camera next to her, pointing up. BILL can be seen standing next to her, peering down at her curiously.]_

**LH:**  
Why didn’t you tell me all of this? And don’t say “because I didn’t want to worry you,” because that’s not an excuse.

**BILL, smiles awkwardly and shrugs:**  
Actually … that’s exactly why. Lanette, even with the risks, I wanted to do this. We’ve done so many things these past two days that I’ve never been able to do on my own during my earlier experiences. But I knew the risks too, and I didn’t want—

_[BILL stops suddenly, his smile vanishing. He looks away and clears his throat.]_

**LH:**  
What? For me to stop you?

_[BILL shakes and bows his head.]_

**BILL, softly:**  
No. To ruin this for you.

**LH:**  
What? _[laughs]_ What, you think I enjoy putting you in danger?

**BILL:**  
What? No! Not like that! I just— _[exhales]_ Lanette, this is as much an experience for you as it is for me. You’ve never been to Galar or trained a flygon or … well. I-I mean… _[quieter]_ How often does this happen? _[motions to himself]_ I thought it would be not only a research opportunity but also an adventure for the both of us. Do you understand?

_[LH looks at her hands.]_

**LH:**  
Bill … on the one hand, no, I don’t. But on the other … yeah. That sounds like your kind of logic. _[smiles]_ It’s amazing to know that no matter what form you take, it’s still you. Guess all the sci-fi movies were wrong about that one. Or maybe there’s just something about you specifically. Like, the world could end around you, or you could be turned into some kind of grotesque monster, but in both cases, I can count on you to be the same old Bill. Stubborn. Head in the clouds. Curious to a fault. And everything else that caught my attention back when we were kids at Celadon U.

_[BILL relaxes. He takes a seat beside LH.]_

**BILL:**  
I can’t tell whether or not any of that was a compliment.

**LH:**  
It was.

**BILL:**  
Oh. Good. Listen, ah, Lanette. I’m sorry for worrying you.

**LH:**  
I’m not really done.

_[BILL sits up. He reaches for LH’s arm, then thinks twice about it and lets his claws hang in the air between them. LH looks at him.]_

**LH:**  
It’s just … this time is different, isn’t it? There’s that other video, and I really think we need to talk about that one.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	13. Relax. Everything's under control!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as earlier. BILL’s private video finishes playing on LH’s phone. BILL is staring into the distance, facing away from the camera.]_

**LH:**  
So. What does this mean?

**BILL:**  
It’s nothing to worry about.

**LH:**  
Nothing to—Bill. You need to tell me right now. What is this really doing to you?

**BILL:**  
Nothing. I’m fine.

**LH:**  
But you said so yourself. _[motions to her phone]_ You said you think what you’re experiencing are a flygon’s instincts. 

_[BILL sighs.]_

**BILL:**  
Sometimes, I get carried away. My mind adapts, and I start—it happens when I wear costumes too. It’s nothing to worry about.

**LH:**  
No. No, what did you mean just now? What do you start to do?

_[Pause. LH grasps BILL’s arm with both hands.]_

**LH:**  
Bill. Please. This is important.

_[BILL bows his head.]_

**BILL:**  
I start to act like a pokémon.

_[Another pause. BILL looks back at LH, then turns and takes one of her wrists in both of his hands.]_

**BILL:**  
Listen. I know what you’re thinking, but you won’t lose me, okay? I still have my memories, and I still know who I am. Nothing will change that.

**LH:**  
But … you’re changing. The-the protectiveness. You said that in the video.

**BILL:**  
That…

_[BILL’s eyes shift to look at the ground.]_

**BILL:**  
That’s not what that means.

**LH:**  
Then what does it mean?

**BILL:**  
It means… _[exhales]_ It means I don’t know what that is.

_[LH opens her mouth.]_

**BILL:**  
Wait. Let me explain. Lanette … I’ll give you this. It’s true that losing myself is a possibility, but it’s a distant one. I’m confident that no matter what happens, no matter how long I’m like this, nothing will change me completely. I won’t ever hurt you, and there won’t be a day when I’ll wake up and be, inside and out, a flygon. But there are other possibilities I’m concerned about.

_[He rests one of his hands on top of hers.]_

**BILL:**  
The first is a sort of halfway point. Some elements of a flygon’s personality may be seeping into my own, so although overall, I don’t think I’ll change all that drastically, I may be more … pokémon-like than you’re used to.

**LH:**  
And … the other possibility?

BILL: Well… _[looks into LH’s eyes]_ Promise me that if I tell you, you won’t think any differently of me.

**LH:**  
What?

**BILL:**  
Please.

**LH:**  
Bill … okay. I promise. Just tell me what’s going on.

_[BILL takes a deep breath. He sits up straight, his entire body stiffening—as if to brace himself for whatever happens next.]_

**BILL:**  
I’ve noticed that whenever I’d wear a costume, I wouldn’t just get into a pokémon’s head. I’d also relax my normal inhibitions. It’s possible that something similar is not only happening right now, but it’s exacerbated by the fact that I’m biologically part pokémon right now—yours technically, at that. In other words, what I’m feeling is a little bit a pokémon’s loyalty to its trainer, but it’s also, quite possibly, mingling with preexisting feelings I’ve had as a human.

_[Long pause. LH slowly pulls her hands away from BILL’s. BILL freezes, then holds one of his hands out to LH.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette—oh no. Oh no, please don’t take that the wrong way! I shouldn’t have said anything; that was over the line. Just—just forget I said that, okay?

**LH:**  
Bill. We don’t know for sure if that’s the—you’ve figured that _is_ the most likely possibility, didn’t you?

_[BILL flinches, folding in on himself a little.]_

**LH:**  
I see. So … why wouldn’t you tell me this?

_[BILL exhales, shakes his head, and slouches in his seat.]_

**BILL:**  
I … I wanted to, but the exact circumstances … how do I put this? _[grips his head with a set of claws]_ Lanette, the last thing I want to do is make any of this uncomfortable for you. I know you well enough to understand that just being my trainer is a bit stranger than what you’re used to, and even then, I… _[a little quieter]_ I never wanted my feelings to disrupt what we had. You’re my closest friend, and I … well, I don’t entirely know what I’m feeling or whether or not it’s the same feeling I had as a human.

_[He removes his hand and looks at her.]_

**BILL:**  
But I want to tell you. Being with you right now has made this the greatest experiment I’ve ever conducted. Using my abilities to help you… _[takes a breath, bows his head a little]_ I don’t know how to describe it, but I do know that doing that makes me feel complete somehow.

_[Pause. BILL looks at her.]_

**BILL:**  
Please say something.

**LH:**  
When you said you didn’t want to disrupt what we had, what did you mean?

**BILL:**  
I… _[bows his head again]_ Lanette, I don’t want to lose you as a friend. I don’t know what these feelings are or why I’m feeling them now. But I do know that whatever they are, I don’t want to lose you because of them.

**LH:**  
You know … out of everything I’ve ever heard you say, that is simultaneously the most human and the silliest thing that’s come out of your mouth.

_[BILL looks up at her, startled.]_

**LH, gently:**  
Bill, I’ve known you for years. And in that time, you have done some pretty weird things. That time you got possessed. That other time you got into a fist fight with Volkner. _All_ of the times you’ve turned into a pokémon. Half of these incidents, I was right there with you, watching you, sighing in exasperation because of you, trying to keep you and sometimes the others from killing yourselves. Did you really think that after all that, I’d be scared off so easily?

**BILL:**  
I…

**LH:**  
If anything … I’m flattered. And glad too. _[grasps his hand again]_ I hope you do figure out what it is you’re feeling. When you do, I’ll be there.

**BILL:**  
Lanette…

**LH:**  
In the meantime, it’s a little cute that you’re protective of me right now. I feel a little like the female lead of those comic books you like. What’s the one in Spinarakman? Maria Jean?

_[BILL shoots back up to sit rod-straight. The green of his face takes on a darker hue, as if he’s blushing.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette!

**LH:**  
Although honestly? I think I’d prefer to be Steelman’s Prue Potter. Steelman’s trusted right-hand girl _and_ a headstrong, independent businesswoman who’s saving his company? I’d be okay with that.

_[BILL scrambles for the camera, but before he can get a good grip on it, LH wraps her arms around his chest and holds him back.]_

**LH, gently again:** Wait. One more thing.

_[BILL hesitates, then sits up, pulling away from LH just a bit—but holding onto her arms as he does so.]_

**LH:**  
Seriously, though. I want to make a promise to you right now. No matter what happens—whether part of you changes because of this body or whether separating the flygon out of you fails or _whatever happens_ —I promise I’m going to help you through it. Then … whatever happens after—if you want space to figure things out or if you want me to stay … we can talk about it then. Because the truth is, Bill? There’s a reason why I haven’t left you over weirder stuff than this. And … I’d like to figure out what that is right along with you. Does that sound like a deal?

**BILL:**  
Lan—yes. Yes, of course. _[pulls himself closer to her]_ Thank you.

_[LH reaches for the camera, but before she turns it off, there’s one last glimpse of her leaning up, a little closer to the crest on BILL’s forehead.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	14. She was just teaching you that friendship is magic, Bill.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH Event: Since Bill is now a pokemon, you can check his nature by looking at his status when he's in the pokeball, right? Just something that I was wondering about.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Still Glimwood Tangle, but BILL and LH are finally on the move again. BILL is apparently holding the camera this time around.]_

**LH:**  
Oh! Yes, of course. He’s highly curious, to no one’s surprise, and also to no one’s surprise, he’s a lonely-natured flygon.

_[Pause.]_

**LH:**  
I’m just kidding. He’s a sassy flygon. The highly curious part still stands, though, and yes, this is still pretty predictable if you knew him.

**BILL, off-screen:**  
…I think I preferred the first one, honestly.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **ryncoon asked:**  
>  (Swsh launch event) What nobody seems to be asking, Bill, is if you would mind staying part pokemon. You certainly seem to enjoy the temporary experience, after all.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, only this time, LH is holding the camera.]_

**LH, off-screen:**  
And be honest, Bill.

**BILL:**  
Er… _[scratches the side of his face]_ Well, if I’m honest, I wouldn’t exactly mind being part pokémon. If anything, it would actually help me in the long-run because I’d be in a unique position that would allow me to further understand the way a pokémon thinks. Any researcher worth their salt would give their right arms to have a full conversation with a pokémon, after all. Besides, ultimately, I’ve always felt that what form I take doesn’t really matter. I’m still me inside, and so long as I have that and so long as I’m still able to work, those are the only things that really matter.

**LH:**  
Uh … really, Bill? You can’t think of anything that would be made a little harder if you were part pokémon? Anything important?

**BILL:**  
Like what?

**LH:**  
Your … your family, for one.

**BILL:**  
Oh. Well. Actually, being part pokémon would give me a handy excuse to not attend family gatherings. You know what those are like.

**LH:**  
Okay, but your mom?

**BILL:**  
Would be happy that I’m still alive.

**LH:**  
And your sisters?

**BILL:**  
Frankly, one of them would be surprised that I haven’t yet permanently and intentionally turned myself into a pokémon already. She’s got good money riding on the idea that I will someday.

**LH:**  
Who would she even make that bet—you know what? Never mind. I’ve still got one important group of people you probably wouldn’t want to freak out by being a half-pokémon affront to nature?

**BILL, smirking:**  
Oh really? And who would they be?

**LH:**  
Your investors.

_[Long, long pause. BILL’s smirk fades.]_

**BILL:**  
Blast it; you’re right.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Have you met a Galarian Ponyta yet? They're GORGEOUS!!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene but this time with a close-up of BILL’s face as he’s holding the camera.]_

**BILL:**  
Oh, we didn’t just meet a Galarian ponyta.

_[He turns the camera around to reveal one standing in a clearing. LH’s arms are wrapped around its neck, and she’s staring at it with reverence.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette made me help her catch one.

**LH, whispering loudly:**  
I’m naming her Evening Glimmer.

**BILL:**  
That’s too long for a nickname! Also, she threw me into a tree, Lanette.

_[The ponyta neighs and bucks her head happily.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Bill, my Trainer would like to know if you, as a Flygon, are able to consume Potions and other health-restoring items in battle, and how they feel like, since you are human. And he also wonders how you are handling the cold, as a Dragon-type. - storageporygon

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, but the ponyta is nowhere in sight. Instead, BILL is seated under a glowing mushroom while LH is kneeling beside him, applying a spray potion.]_

**BILL, wincing and through gritted teeth:**  
Yeah. Those work on me. They’re a little uncomfortable, though, but that’s not so much because I’m part human as it is because it’s a disinfectant spray directly onto a wound.

_[LH sprays potion onto BILL’s arm, causing him to hiss and exhale in pain.]_

**LH, without looking up:**  
You’re being dramatic; Evening only threw you into a tree with Confusion once. 

**BILL:**  
Right, because the other time was with Psybeam, and the third was with Sto—

_[BILL yelps as LH sprays his arm in a long, continuous sweep. He winces, then clears his throat.]_

**BILL:**  
So. It’s just Evening, then?

**LH:**  
It’s actually Princess Evening Glimmer of Ponytaville Castle, but I call her Evening for short. And because you were right about the pokémon nickname module. If I didn’t think it would be abused, I’d propose we fix that. _[looks up at him]_ Anyway, there was a part two to this question. About how you feel as a part ground/dragon-type in cold weather?

**BILL:**  
Ah! Well. That I admit is a little uncomfortable too. This body doesn’t quite deal with cold weather all that much, as you can imagine. Cold slows me down considerably, not to mention it’s almost physically painful to be out in the cold for long periods of time—like standing outside in a snowstorm completely naked, that’s how painful it would be. Luckily, Lanette isn’t fond of cold weather herself, so the amount of time we’ve spent in the colder areas of the region has been minimal. _[slight pause]_ Actually, if I’m quite honest, being a flygon has helped me understand her better too. I never could understand why you hated the cold so much, but now? _[sucks in a breath]_ I sympathize, Lanette. I truly do.

_[LH looks him dead in the eye. Then sprays his arm again.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	15. “How much did all of this cost anyway?” Idk, Bill has a credit card.

> **nt1274 asked:**  
>  How much did the hotel room cost?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[A small, quaint bedroom. The room is lit with an old-fashioned lamp on the dresser—an apparent necessity, as the window across the room shows that the outside is dark. The camera is on the bed in the center of the room, just a couple of feet from the window, and LH’s bag is just at the edge of the frame. It moves, followed by the camera, as LH walks out of the room.]_

**LH:**  
A bit more than I’m used to, I have to admit. We haven’t exactly been staying at five-star hotels, but Bill’s insisted that I stay wherever I’d be comfortable.

_[She walks down a set of stairs and to the front desk to hand over a key. LH and the desk attendant exchange pleasantries which aren’t recorded here for the sake of time, and after that point, LH leaves, entering the town of Ballonlea. The entire street is dark and overshadowed by a thick canopy of trees, to the point where the only real light is coming from the glowing mushrooms between each building. LH walks down the stone street for a bit to take in the sights. She sweeps the camera up slowly to record every last part of the town.]_

**LH:**  
In other words, Bill’s given me a credit card and told me not to worry about cost so much as safety and comfort. I feel a little guilty about accepting, so I’ve tried to be modest. But, well. Sometimes, it’s not easy to be both modest and cost-conscious.

_[She stops in the middle of town, right in front of the gym.]_

**LH:**  
Truth is, though, that’s why I sort of believed what Bill said yesterday. He hasn’t realized this, but I have: that behavior he’s talking about? Has always been a thing. I guess he’s never really noticed it until now because this is the longest time we’ve spent together alone in, well, a long time. It’s cute, though, but I hope he figures things out soon. I can’t imagine how frustrating it must be for all of you to watch that. Anyway!

_[She drops her bag onto the ground and sets the camera next to it. Opening her bag, she draws BILL’s poké ball out and cracks it open to release him. He roars and stretches, then shakes his body and blinks at LH.]_

**LH:**  
Morning, Bill. How was your night?

**BILL, quietly:**  
Not bad. Yours?

**LH:**  
Not bad at all. Sorry I didn’t let you out last night. The room was a bit too small for a dragon. _[picks up her bag and the camera]_ Ready for breakfast?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  (swsh) I've heard Galar has some... interesting fossilmon. Planning to check them out? Concerned it'll make "separate Bill and Flygon" worries worse?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. LH has her head cocked a little as she replies.]_

**LH:**  
Well, we’ve heard of the fossil pokémon here—a couple days ago, to be exact. They’re … interesting, but thankfully, all of Bill’s ideas on the subject are perfectly innocent ones he’ll pursue after he changes back.

**BILL:**  
Hm? I didn’t say—

**LH, more insistently:**  
All of Bill’s ideas on the subject are perfectly innocent ones he’ll pursue after he changes back.

**BILL:**  
Yes, ma’am.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Lanette, now that Bill's a Pokemon, why don't you just treat him as any other Pokemon and make him do things for you? Why let him still do research? You can have a sapient pet who can't refuse you! And if he doesn't behave, you can have Evening have her way with him again.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
What is it with all of you and wanting to see me in awkward, uncomfortable, or dangerous situations?

**LH:**  
Schadenfreude. There’s something about watching a super-genius with dragon powers run into a lot of bad luck.

**BILL:**  
I am almost certain that’s not it.

**LH:**  
Anyway. _[places her cup down]_ As interesting as that idea is, I couldn’t do that. Remember, I knew Bill as a human, and he’s been my best friend longer as that than as a pokémon. Treating him like a pet now would just be … weird, to put it lightly. Besides, nothing will ever stop Bill from doing research. Even if I tried, he’ll find a way to go around me and continue his work. I can make him do other things, though, as his trainer. Within reason, of course.

**BILL:**  
Oh really?

_[LH holds out her hand, palm up.]_

**LH:**  
Shake.

_[BILL immediately puts one of his claws in her hand. He stares at her for a second, then screws his face up in confusion.]_

**BILL:**  
Wait a second…

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  BILL!!! LANETTE!!! NOW'S THE PERFECT TIME... To go to a bar and have Lanette bet with people that Bill can't speak! He can answer things with "fly" for a few questions and then just break out in all his human-talk glory! Make bank!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH and BILL are sitting in a tavern. LH is enjoying a cider while BILL sits next to her, resting his head on his claws. After a few moments, a young man—only slightly older than her, by the looks of it—sits next to her with a pint of beer.]_

**MAN:**  
Lovely flygon you got there, lass. Haven’t seen it or you around before, though. You from here?

**LH, smiling:**  
No. Just a visitor. But thank you. _[cocks her head at him]_ My partner is a very talented flygon. He’s been with me for a long while now. But you know what his best trick is?

_[The MAN smirks and reaches into a pocket, presumably to grab for a poké ball.]_

**MAN:**  
Battlin’?

**LH:**  
Better. He talks.

_[BILL opens one of his eyes. The MAN stares at LH, his smile faltering.]_

**MAN:**  
A-aye?

**LH:**  
Mm-hmm. But I can tell you don’t believe me.

**MAN:**  
Yes, well—

**LH:**  
So let’s make a wager. _[places money on the table in front of her]_ This much if I’m telling the truth. This much to you if I’m lying.

_[She removes her hand to let the MAN see. He glances down, and his eyes grow wide.]_

**MAN:**  
All right, lass. It’s a deal.

_[He places an equal amount of money on the table and reaches his hand out, which LH takes. They shake, and as soon as they let go, LH bucks her head towards BILL.]_

**LH:**  
Flygon, what do you call it when someone is no longer here?

**BILL, mimicking a flygon’s voice:**  
Gon!

**LH:**  
And what’s a small, annoying insect that eats fruit?

**BILL:**  
Fly!

**MAN:**  
Oi, lass—

**LH:**  
And who is the greatest trainer of all time?

_[The MAN looks at BILL, who shrugs noncommittally.]_

**BILL, speaking normally:**  
Well, that’s a matter of opinion, isn’t it?

_[The MAN’s jaw drops. LH finishes off her cider, takes the money off the table, and with a smile and a small bow, she starts to walk out of the tavern with BILL, holding the camera, behind her.]_

**LH:**  
So … that’s what your dad used to do?

**BILL:**  
All the time, but with an eevee with a small voice recorder hidden under his neck ruff. That was great, if you don’t mind me saying.

**LH:**  
I have to admit, I didn’t think you’d want to do something your father would do.

**BILL:**  
Call it scientific curiosity—largely to see if it would work.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	16. "Why is everything that’s cute trying to kill me?"

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  I'm imagining Bill using Dig to help around the garden, digging up nutrient rich soul, plowing fields, creating spaces where water types can create ponds... wonder if Dig can be used to create little caves in the sides of cliffs/hills? imagine! a tiny house for some cave dwelling pokemon to live in nearby...

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Outside. BILL stretches his wings, but his eyes are on the sky in thought. LH is finishing putting her pack together, zipping it up, adjusting the straps before slipping it on. She then stoops to pick up the camera from the ground.]_

**BILL:**  
Hm. That’s a thought: using these abilities beyond simple testing.

_[LH climbs onto his back. He hooks his arms around her legs, and she braces herself against his neck while firmly holding the camera.]_

**BILL:**  
Would we have enough time for that once we get back, Lanette? Go into the forest and do a few wild pokémon some favors, I mean.

**LH:**  
You know … that would be nice. Anyway, Wild Area. Ready?

**BILL:**  
Right. Of course.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Oh! Oh! Bill! We have Clefairy colonies here in Galar! They're admittedly fairly rare even by the standards of Clefairy in other regions I know you are interested in comparing and contrasting! I... can't honestly tell you where they are though. We have a lot of mines, active and abandoned, and Glimwood Tangle. It isn't uncommon to see Clefairy out in the Wild Area when it gets particularly foggy, or on the Full Moon though, so I'm going to assume they likely live in the mines/mountains?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Wild Area—specifically, a small stretch of land lying between a river and tall, majestic arched bridges. It’s foggy, but the camera can just pick out LH (standing close) and BILL’s silhouette a few feet behind her.]_

**LH:**  
Actually, according to my sources, Galarian clefairy don’t make their homes in caves or mountains like many of their other relatives, but rather right here, beneath these bridges close to civilization. It’s possible that these clefairy nests stem from feral clefairy either lost or released into the wild after being caught and brought in from other regions—maybe Kalos, even. Either way, a background of domestication would explain why they don’t seek out habitats you’d expect to find wild clefairy in. They wouldn’t know to do that and would instead set up their breeding grounds wherever they feel safest—out in the open, in this case.

_[She pauses and turns to look off into the distance, beyond the camera, while shielding her eyes with a hand. Behind her, BILL wanders off to the right.]_

**LH:**  
Or … at least, I think they’re here. Rumor has it that they appear only in fog, but we haven’t seen one yet. Maybe they’re just—

_[A clefairy cries out behind her. She whips around to see BILL’s silhouette stopped a few feet away. Several other clefairy cries sound out, followed by a scream from BILL. His silhouette starts sprinting to the left; a chorus of angry clefairy songs and frantic grass rustling follow him.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette, I think I’ve found them! And they are not friendly! Ah! No! No! Bad clefairy!

_[A flash of pink light shoots into BILL’s silhouette, and he falls out of frame.]_

**BILL:**  
Ow! Nice clef—no! Don’t—you are all very fluffy but—help!

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  [SWSH EVENT] Hi, Bill and Lanette! It's Aurora Aspen from @pokehaviors. I just wanted to let you both know that you're a huge inspiration and it's so exciting to see you exploring Galar! I really hope you can look into the Pokemon there for all of us Researchers who don't have the current funds to visit the region. Anything you can tell us about Gigantamaxing? - A.A.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Wild Area—a clearing near a tent. BILL is lying with his head in LH’s lap; LH is spraying potion on various wounds—mostly from fairy magic—across his chest and shoulders. Behind them, EVENING prances about the clearing with LACROIX and A CLEFAIRY on her back.]_

**BILL, through clenched teeth:**  
How can they be so cute and painful? _[points at her]_ Speaking of which … I read that reply from that one follower of ours. Tell them off for thinking I’m dead.

**LH:**  
Mmhmm. Anyway, about this ask?

**BILL:**  
Right. Right. 

_[He sits up, with effort, then looks at the camera.]_

**BILL:**  
First and foremost, good to hear from you, Professor Aspen! I hope all is going well in Unova!

That said … gigantamaxing. It’s actually a fascinating phenomenon. In terms of power and the way it works, it’s really no different from ordinary dynamaxing, from what I can tell. In both cases, a pokémon undergoes a transformation triggered by an influx of raw energy, the overflow of which feeds into their techniques to create not only—obviously enough—a giant pokémon but also a supercharged elemental technique to boot. The difference is in the way the influx of energy is expressed physically. In only a select few pokémon, this energy triggers a form change, resulting in a dramatically altered appearance in addition to a gigantic size and supercharged attacks. 

I admit I don’t know for certain what causes this; Professor Magnolia, the leading expert in the dynamax and gigantamax phenomena, is rather difficult to get an audience with, especially given that one of us is currently … not in the best state for discussing pokémon theory. However, I do have a few ideas of my own. Namely, for the most part, gigantamaxing is limited to only specific individuals within each verified species. That is to say, a select few pikachu can gigantamax, not all of them. This tells me that there could be a mutation found in only a select few colonies of these specific pokémon that causes a form change upon dynamaxing, resulting in gigantamaxing instead. As for why there may be a separate form, in some cases—such as in garbodor or butterfree, whose forms resemble their base forms, only with certain key differences—it may simply be a mutation of a dynamaxed form. In others, such as those that are drastically changed upon gigantamaxing, it’s entirely possible that this was a form that all members of the species could take a long time ago but no longer possess the ability to achieve. In that sense, it’s much like mega evolution in that it’s popularly thought that all pokémon once had the capability to achieve it (that is, mega evolution) as well long ago but lost the ability somewhere along the line.

Or in short, gigantamaxing is a fascinating phenomenon, for sure, and I have every intention to study it thoroughly, once I understand how to track down a pokémon capable of it.

**LH:**  
And by that you mean track down an eevee capable of gigantamaxing?

**BILL:**  
And by that I mean track down an eevee capable of gigantamaxing, yes.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	17. Flygon subsist on dewdrops and hope.

> **diabeticdino asked:**  
>  Sword & Shield Event - Hey, I noticed that in camps when making curry that Flygons can only take a small, tiny spoonful to eat. How is Bill handling that?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Similar scene—near the tent, in a field. This time, however, there’s a pot sitting on a fire, near a small picnic area. LH and BILL are at the picnic area, along with all of LH’s other pokémon—the latter three of whom are busy wolfing down curry. BILL and LH have their own plates, but BILL’s is much smaller than the others. LH isn’t looking at the camera or BILL but rather her own plate of curry, which she eats carefully.]_

**BILL:**  
Quite well, actually. Although I do indeed like curry, I get the feeling that it would be rather intense for me right now, given how sensitive my tongue is in this form.

_[Pause. BILL scratches his cheek with a single claw.]_

**BILL:**  
Also…

**LH:**  
Before you finish that thought, let me remind you which one of us burned instant ramen on four separate occasions last year.

**BILL:**  
Touché.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **feniczoroark replied to your post “Sword & Shield Event - Hey, I noticed that in camps when making curry…”**  
> How do you burn instant noodles?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
I might have gotten … a little distracted.

**LH:**  
Which means he got so caught up in his research that he forgot to add water.

**BILL:**  
That was only once.

**LH:**  
Or forgot about his pot of ramen entirely, leaving the water to boil off first.

**BILL, bowing his head:**  
And there are the other three times. Okay.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - What are your other traits aside from your sassy nature? I assume one personality trait is that you love Lanette. - storageporygon

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, only this time, the other three pokémon are back to playing in the field while BILL and LANETTE are sitting by the campsite.]_

**BILL:**  
What other traits do I— _[stops and reads the last part]_ Wait, I, uh—what?

_[LH smiles and leans back in her seat.]_

**LH:**  
Sassy. Highly curious. A bit average potential, admittedly, but perfectly adequate in battle, among other things. And yes—highly loyal. Shall I go on?

**BILL, still frazzled:**  
What? I—what?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  im sure your investors would be more than happy to continue to fund your projects if given the choice between doing so or a dragon breath to the face.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, but the picnic is packed away.]_

**BILL:**  
“I’m sure your investors would be more than happy to—”

_[He stops and grins widely. LH huffs and rolls her eyes.]_

**LH:**  
No, Bill. No.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH Have either of you ran into the regions local starters or evolutions? The grookey line is particularly cute!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. LH and BILL are watching the other three pokémon.]_

**LH:**  
Sadly, no. Which is a shame because I’d love to have a sobble. They’re so cute! I mean, grookey is nice, but there’s just something sweet about the look on a sobble’s face…!

**BILL:**  
Given the way your last three captures have gone—namely, regarding my role in them and how many potions I needed afterwards—I’m not entirely sure I’d be so enthusiastic to find out what that something sweet is.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Does bill have problems seeing glass in doors/windows?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL and LH, simultaneously:**  
No./Yes.

_[They look at each other. BILL sighs heavily.]_

**BILL:**  
Okay, a bit. These lenses make it incredibly difficult to tell whether or not a window is open.

_[He places his claws on the red bulb over his right eye. It clinks under his claws.]_

**LH:**  
He walked into a glass door on our first day here. It was mildly embarrassing, but other than that, no harm done. Except, well, to his dignity.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  (swsh event) so you've talked about the slight risk of not being able to turn human again or whatever, if you had to run through it and get stuck as a different pokemon what would you choose?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, but BILL is resting his head on LH’s lap while lying on his back.]_

**BILL:**  
Ditto.

**LH:**  
That’s cheating.

**BILL:**  
Ah, maybe so, but it’s the perfect answer. That way, I can assume the form of any other pokémon, which would allow me to then study any other pokémon. There are absolutely no downsides.

**LH:**  
And I’d assume you’d use that to turn back into a human being once in a while?

**BILL:**  
Well, sure, I suppose…

**LH:**  
In that case, why not choose Mew? You get Transform, a slew of other powers besides that, and the body of one of the rarest, most powerful pokémon in existence.

_[Notable pause. BILL flicks his tail in thought.]_

**BILL:**  
Is it too late to change my answer?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Did you two, er, know that my Porygon apparently ships you? I've never seen it do such a thing before.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Exact same scene. BILL freezes, his tail curled up, mid-flick.]_

**BILL:**  
They do what now?

**LH:**  
Aww, that’s very sweet of them. And fascinating for a porygon to do. That’s very human-like, isn’t it, Bill? _[pats him on the shoulder]_

**BILL:**  
Sorry, what?

**LH, frowns:**  
Doesn’t even notice when a rare pokémon does something unusual. Wow, that must be serious.

_[BILL flicks his tail.]_

**BILL:**  
In any case, I quite agree that it’s fascinating, anonymous. Send us further reports, if you don’t mind? It would be interesting if we did indeed approach a sort of singularity. Come to think of it, I might have an idea for when we get back…

**LH, with a forced and irritated smile:**  
And there’s the Bill I know.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH! Hi, um, I'm a baker from Ryme City and...well. You probably heard about The Parade, right? I got an injury settlement because of it, and I've decided to invest that into getting an Alcremie. Someone mentioned I should ask you two, since you're over there and Lanette wanted one, about how to care for them and help them get along with my three. I have a Raichu and Rattata from Alola, an Umbreon I adopted here, and I'm moving home someday. Is that enough info for good advice..?

> **pokehaviors:**  
>  I think you’re looking for @bills-pokedex, not me! An innocent mistake.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as earlier, only this time, BILL is actually sitting up, while LH is scrolling through her phone.]_

**LH:**  
Oh dear. We should definitely help Professor Aspen out here, as this one’s our fault.

**BILL:**  
Certainly! Regarding alcremie, while I admit alcremie is still fairly new, I’ve been able to gather a few notes from my partner’s research.

**LH:**  
By which I mean he’s overheard every conversation I’ve had with other people about them, and he’s far better at remembering details like these than I am.

**BILL:**  
Right. So, alcremie. Care for alcremie is actually rather simple and hinges quite heavily on what you feed them. While alcremie actually has a varied diet, it’s important to also feed them fresh cream or whipped cream and foods or sweets of their specific flavors—for example, strawberries to strawberry alcremie, lemons to lemon alcremie, tea to matcha alcremie, and so forth. This allows them to cycle out undigested food, food waste, surface dirt, and other imperfections to their bodies, which will be sloughed off their skin as new cream flows into their systems. In that sense, you don’t need to wash or clean up after your alcremie, save for an occasional mop or vacuum. Many alcremie trainers like to give theirs a bowl or such to sit in as they feed in order to catch the, ah, waste. Also, contrary to popular belief, they can drink water, and in fact, this is highly recommended to avoid crusty skin, or a condition in which an alcremie’s skin hardens and becomes brittle and chalky. It’s just that you shouldn’t give them excessive water, which is really true of any pokémon. That in mind, giving them a dish of clean water should be fine.

Beyond that, alcremie do not require a bed, but it’s recommended that you give them a pan of their own in a cool room, rather than allow them to sleep with you. This is because the sloughing process accelerates during their sleep cycles, so it’s really in your best interest to let them rest in a place where they would be most comfortable and where cleaning up after them would be the easiest. Incidentally, the results of such a process look exactly like milk, but it’s highly recommended to not let your pokémon eat this. Rather, simply dump it down a drain, and you should be fine.

In terms of enrichment, alcremie adore play of any sort and will be perfectly happy with any kind of toy or companion. Thus, your last question hinges entirely on the personality of the individual. The sweeter the alcremie—and I do mean that both literally and in terms of personality—the easier they will find acclimating to your team. This isn’t to say that a bitter or sour-flavored alcremie won’t find it easy to get along with others; just that you may need to keep an eye on them. I would recommend any tip I’ve outlined in our team building tag for any issues regarding team members who are finding it difficult to adjust.

Best of luck!

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	18. You don't want to know what that clefairy said.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  So Bill, are you able to communicate with other pokemon, now that you are one?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL and LH are walking through the Wild Area, through fields and towards a giant rock formation. LH is holding the camera and pointing it to BILL. On his other side, LACROIX and LH’S CLEFAIRY are riding EVENING.]_

**BILL:**  
Actually, yes. I haven’t had a major conversation with them since meeting that one corviknight in Motostoke, but I’ve been able to understand all pokémon perfectly well. Or, well, I can understand them in a literal sense. Understanding their meaning is an entirely different story.

_[The CLEFAIRY chatters something to him with an innocent grin. He points at it.]_

**BILL:**  
See, he just said something about my mother, but I have no idea what he means by “[CENSORED].”

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **lucario2012 asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - So we saw Bill Dynamaxing, and fighting Evening, but have you had any particularly interesting Trainer battles yet?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[In the shadow of the stone from earlier. This time, it’s BILL who’s holding the camera. LH is a couple feet away, her bag on the ground. She’s kneeling beside it, rifling through. Her other pokémon surround her.]_

**LH:**  
A couple. I eventually did get that gym battle but not with Raihan. It was with Milo, the first gym leader of the circuit. Same day, though, and a lot easier. The gossifleur was almost tricky, though.

**BILL:**  
He nearly killed me with Max Overgrowth.

**LH, seemingly ignoring him:**  
Milo was nice, though—probably the nicest person I’ve met in Galar so far. I’ll need to follow up with an email to him, just to keep in touch.

**BILL:**  
She’s … very interested in strong trainers.

_[LH smirks into her bag.]_

**LH:**  
Then there was the trainer with the eevee. The one that also nearly killed Bill.

**BILL:**  
Look, it was so _fluffy_.

**LH:**  
Mmhmm.

_[She stands with a poké ball in hand, then looks out to the fields of tall grass in front of her.]_

**LH:**  
Okay, guys. Ready to hunt for a milcery?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **lucario2012 asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Has anyone tried giving Bill ear scritches (or the Flygon equivalent)? Or has his dignity and/or general awkwardness held up too much for that?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH, BILL, and LH’S POKEMON are wandering through a field of grass. EVENING, THE CLEFAIRY, and LACROIX are wandering in separate directions several feet from LH; BILL is sticking by her side. LH is the one holding the camera this time.]_

**BILL, muttering:**  
Depending on whom you ask, I never had any dignity to begin with…

_[LH snorts with laughter, then reaches up and touches the side of BILL’s head lightly with her palm.]_

**LH:**  
Sadly, flygon don’t have ears, which makes ear scratching rather difficult. However, if you scratch them just under the chin…

_[She moves her fingers to scratch the lower side of BILL’s cheek and just under his chin. He stops and closes his eyes, lifting his head a little while emitting a trilling purr.]_

**LH:**  
…then most flygon will basically turn into putty in your hands. Some will even flip over to give their trainers easier access to key parts for belly rubs and more petting.

_[BILL flops backwards, onto his back. One of his feet can still be seen in the shot, kicking in response to LH’s scratchings, until it finally stops, half a minute after she’s stopped scratching him. LH motions to the downed flygon with her free hand.]_

**LH:**  
Like so.

**BILL:**  
What just happened?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Bill, on behalf of all of us at Silph Ventures, and, I imagine, your other legitimate shareholders, I must ask you to cease this madness and return to a secure location - and human form - at once. Your irresponsible gallivanting in Galar has inspired "Rocket Labs" to acquire Devon Investments' shares in Pokemon Box Inc., and they are incredibly interested in using this to force you to hand them your genetic modification technology - and develop it further, likely in a way none of us will enjoy.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[The camera has been set on a nearby rock. LH and BILL look at the phone, then exchange glances.]_

**BILL:**  
To clarify, I think Lanette meant the investors in my side research. My tech research is fully funded by my employer, the Pokémon Cutting-Edge Technology Research Center; it’s just they give me very strict rules as to what does and doesn’t count as “the thing they’ve hired me for” after that … one incident.

**LH:**  
The one where you brought the mutant slowpoke _into the annual open house, which caused Team Rocket to attack our headquarters?_

**BILL:**  
No, I meant the other one. The one with the talking meowth.

**LH:**  
Oh, you mean the analyzer that—

**BILL, holding up a set of claws:**  
The-the less said about that, the better.

**LH:**  
Uh huh.

**BILL:**  
_Anyway,_ the side research—which covers pokémon behavior, pokémon documentation, and inventions that the Tech Center has rejected—that’s more of my hobby, but sadly, they’re the sort of thing I need funding for, as a gentleman apparently can’t just go off and study world-changing sciences on his own dime these days. You have reams of paperwork to fill out to prove that it’s world-changing science, and even then, you’d be _lucky_ to get a cent of funding unless it can be weaponized or commoditized! Honestly, whatever happened to science for science’s sake?

**LH:**  
I blame Edison.

**BILL:**  
Bloody—don’t get me started on Edison.

**LH:**  
Anyway, I’m curious: what _would_ you do if someone forced you to do research for nefarious purposes? Let’s say your funding was on the line.

**BILL, shrugging:**  
Eh. If I knew what they would do with it and I didn’t particularly like that plan, I would probably do a really terrible job out of spite. Or build a box that played “Rasputin” on loop. If you’re going to give me funding, quite seriously, do not tell me what to do with it.

**LH:**  
Unless it’s to tell you what _not_ to do with it, as our employers frequently do?

**BILL:**  
Unless it’s to tell me what _not_ to do with it, as our employers frequently do, yes.

**LH:**  
Can I also request that you don’t name that company you’ve been planning Pokémon Box, Inc? I know you’ve been tossing that name around Chatotter, but… _[sucks on teeth]_ This is another Sea Cottage.

**BILL:**  
What? What’s wrong with Pokémon Box, Inc?! _Or_ the Sea Cottage?!

**LH:**  
Where do I begin…?

_[A MILCERY cries out several feet away. LH and BILL whirl around and take a step apart, just enough for the camera to catch a glimpse of said MILCERY suspended in mid-air by a psychic hold. A Moonblast collides with it, causing it to cry out and the hold to vanish, and it drops, only to be caught by the CLEFAIRY. The CLEFAIRY rushes it through the grass and to LH’s feet.]_

**LH:**  
Ah! Good job, Ariel!

_[She drops the poké ball she’s been holding onto the squirming MILCERY, who’s drawn into it at once. ARIEL grabs the ball as it drops and holds it until it stops moving in his paws, after which LH stoops down to take it.]_

**LH:**  
I think I’ll call you … Mary.

**BILL:**  
And you joke about _my_ names…

_[LH rolls her eyes and glares at him.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	19. Click here if you like dragons. Or apples.

> **nt1274 asked:**  
>  You could ask the trainer who gigantamaxed their Eevee before — like, asking where they found it, what, other than gigantamax capability, makes it different from other Eevees, maybe even talk to the Eevee yourself?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH is leading the party through the Wild Area. BILL is on her left, and beyond him is EVENING. LACROIX and ARIEL are on EVENING’s back; MARY is riding BILL’s head.]_

**LH:**  
Did we ever actually get that trainer’s number? I don’t think we have.

_[BILL’s eyes go wide, and he stops dead in his tracks. LH swings the camera around to face him as he stares off into the middle distance for a long while.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **askvoidbearandfriends asked:**  
>  [SWSH EVENT] Have you seen a Flapple or Appletun yet? I want to know how you feel about the Apple Dragons.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**LH:**  
I haven’t, but I wouldn’t mind looking for one. Or at least looking for appletun. I actually think it’s cute with its helmet like that.

**BILL:**  
What about flapple?

**LH:**  
It’s not bad exactly, but I don’t think it’s quite as cute.

**BILL:**  
Of course. So … I do believe you can catch one more pokémon for a full team, Lanette. What’s the information on this one?

_[She hands him the camera and pulls out her phone.]_

**LH:**  
I don’t know. Let’s see … oh! Here we go. Appletun evolves from applin that are given a sweet apple. Applin, meanwhile, are located … oh! Right around here! But … you probably won’t like this next part.

**BILL:**  
Why? What’s wrong?

_[LH looks up from her phone.]_

**LH:**  
Applin are grass/dragon-types.

_[Pause.]_

**BILL:**  
Go get ‘em, Ariel!

_[ARIEL chatters angrily off screen.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Bill, who exactly are your investors and why *wouldn't* they be interested in technology that can turn someone into a pokemon and back? I'd pay good money to try that...

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH, who’s holding the camera at this point, and BILL have stopped at the side of the path. LACROIX and ARIEL are riding EVENING into a field; MARY is still sitting on BILL’s head.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, that depends. I’m formally employed by the Pokémon Cutting-Edge Technology Research Center, as I’ve mentioned in our previous log, and they fund most of my tech research. Everything else tends to be parceled out to whomever is willing, but it’s often that Celadon University funds my research into ancient pokémon and pokémon behavior, while smaller companies such as Pokémon Labs pick up my more … interesting research, to put it lightly. As for why they wouldn’t be interested in genetic research, there are several reasons.

**LH:**  
The ethics, for one.

**BILL:**  
Yes. Apparently, the ethics of turning a live subject into an entirely different species is ethically ambiguous and generally considered to be medically unsafe. But really, it’s more that genetic modification apparently doesn’t have that many financially beneficial applications.

**LH:**  
As in, there really isn’t that high of a demand for being able to turn into a species that then won’t continue to buy more tech.

**BILL:**  
Right? Who knew? Capitalism at its finest, honestly.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH event: Always make sure to practice your giant Pokeball throwing! The first time I threw a Dynamaxed ball I tried it one handed and I sprained my shoulder. Now I do it with both hands!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**LH:**  
Woof. Tell me about it. I really tried not to let you all notice in our first experience with dynamaxing, but even with two hands on the ball, that was not easy to throw. [rubs her wrists] I got used to it, though.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - I told my Porygon not to ship you because who knows if it's actually wrong, you know? I'm very sorry if it made you uncomfortable with your questions. By the way, what does Slowpoke tail curry taste like?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene as earlier.]_

**BILL:**  
Ah…

**LH:**  
It’s okay! It’s actually very cute, although who knows at this point. It seems like it all hinges on a certain someone figuring a thing or few out.

**BILL:**  
I…

**LH:**  
As for slowpoke curry, Bill didn’t eat any because it’s a little ethically iffy in Johtonian culture, but I had a bit. It was … weird. The tail was sweet and chewy, but somehow, it just worked in curry. It was like … eating octopus in anything, you know?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  (SWSH) Bill, are you familiar with Professor Willow and his research? How do dynamaxed Pokemon compare to raid bosses from his region?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
I am indeed. The raid bosses are a fascinating phenomenon. They’re not fueled by dynamax energy, but they’re very similar in terms of processes. It’s very possible that raid bosses are powered—in much the same way that dynamaxed pokémon are powered—by the energy run-off from pokémon gyms. Still, this is only a theory, and I look forward to updates from Professor Willow in the future. If phenomena such as dynamax and whatever powers raid bosses occurs across multiple regions, then that unlocks fantastic, untold possibilities when it comes to the power of pokémon.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH LAUNCH - Can we feed Alcremie clotted cream?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. BILL is holding the camera; LH is watching ARIEL enter a patch of grass.]_

**BILL:**  
Ah, yes, of course! Any sort of cream will do: heavy, whipped, clotted … perhaps even cream cheese and ice cream, although the latter is flavored and may not agree with an alcremie’s body chemistry. Always be wary of an alcremie’s form before giving yours just any ice cream; pair her with an ice cream that complements her flavor, in other words.

_[ARIEL cries out and fires a Moonblast. An APPLIN responds with a yelp.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Swsh: Bill, Lanette, which new galarian pokemon is your favorite pokemon and why?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene, but this time, LH is recalling ARIEL. Next to him (formerly, anyway) is an APPLIN, which peers up at LH. LH stoops down to give it an apple.]_

**BILL:**  
And this one is…?

**LH:**  
Braeburn. Not my favorite apple, but still a pretty good name for a dragon.

_[She pets BRAEBURN and recalls it.]_

**LH:**  
Speaking of favorites, this question. If I had to choose, probably milcery and alcremie. They’re just too adorable to resist. Don’t tell the others.

**BILL:**  
Your secret’s safe with me. As for my favorite, it’s a shame there hasn’t been a new eeveelution discovered in this region. I must admit that it’s quite a difficult choice; they’re all utterly fascinating. But if I had to choose one and only one, I have a fondness for corviknight, ever since that conversation earlier this week. _[pause]_ I wonder if that corviknight ever talked to the others about unionizing…

_[LH casts a look at him.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SwSh - Bill, what will you miss about being a flygon?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL is undergoing his usual series of stretches to prepare for flight. LH is holding the camera, apparently. None of her other pokémon are out.]_

**BILL:**  
Oh, without a doubt, flying. This was my first time in a body capable of actual flight, and let me tell you, readers: the experience is completely indescribable. There’s a sense of freedom that nothing else can replicate, and the view from the sky is absolutely fantastic. The only problem is I can’t see it in full color, but I still wouldn’t trade it for anything.

_[He shakes himself off, then hesitates.]_

**BILL:**  
Or, well, that’s one thing I’ll miss.

**LH:**  
What’s the other?

_[BILL looks at her with a smirk. He stretches his wings one more time, then bows low.]_

**BILL:**  
To Circhester?

**LH:**  
Wh-oh. Well. _[laughs]_ Okay. To Circhester.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	20. Obligatory Hot Springs Episode

> **tacoman1320x asked:**  
>  SWSH launch: Not sure if pessimism, optimism, or something totally unrelated, but if Bill *doesn't* return to being 100% human, I'm maybe a bit excited to see what he'll be like.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL lands in the center of Circhester. Very light flurries drift onto stone walkways, only to be blown along the street by a bitter wind. LH dismounts and shivers, and noticing this, BILL extends a wing and wraps it around her, despite shivering himself.]_

**BILL:**  
Remind me again why we’re doing this?

**LH:**  
Scientific curiosity. _[takes a deep breath and straightens]_ I’m okay. You?

_[BILL straightens and wraps his wings around himself, then takes a deep, steady breath.]_

**BILL:**  
Perfectly fine.

**LH:**  
Good. _[starts walking]_ So, um. About this question.

**BILL, with a snort and a smirk:**  
I’d be interested in seeing what that would be like too. Just imagine: perfect balance between human and pokémon? I wonder how the human side of me would react to wielding raw elemental energy.

**LH, narrows her eyes:**  
And that’s one of many, many reasons why it’s in the best of both our interests if this didn’t happen.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **tacoman1320x asked:**  
>  SWSH Hey Lanette, when you get the chance to evolve Mary, mind recording the process? I think that's something a lot of us would like to watch.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Midday. LH stands in the square close to the edge of town. She looks at her phone, then slips it into her bag. In its place, she draws out two things: one is a small bag, and the other is a poké ball. Opening the poké ball, she releases MARY onto the ground. She gets down onto one knee and reaches into the bag to draw out a handful of blueberries. MARY chirps and reaches with small, stubby hands towards the berries, which LH uses to decorate MARY’s head. Then, LH scoops MARY up in her arms, takes off her glasses, and holds them out to BILL.]_

**LH:**  
Hold these for me, would you?

**BILL:**  
Of course.

_[LH smiles and withdraws, taking a few steps back while MARY tries to eat the berries decorating her head. Holding MARY close, LH takes a deep breath. Then, she pushes off the ground and spins counterclockwise. She spins on the slightly icy ground for several seconds before stomping to a halt. MARY trills and jumps out of her arms, and LH stumbles backwards several steps. BILL quickly places the camera on the ground and darts out to catch her, and as he steadies LH, they both look at MARY. MARY, who has landed a foot away from LH, has burst into a brilliant glow. She grows quickly, shifting in form until the light dissipates to reveal a pink, blue-eyed alcremie standing before them. MARY, in her new form, giggles and reaches for LH.]_

**LH:**  
Oh! Isn’t she so sweet!

_[LH tries to stoop and reach for MARY, but she stumbles again, prompting BILL to help her kneel. MARY immediately dives for her, climbing into her arms while she rubs her head.]_

**LH:**  
Sorry. Sorry. I’m okay. Just … wow, don’t let me spin like that again.

_[LH leans against BILL with a smile and MARY still in her arms.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie:**  
>  Confirmed: Bill enjoys being ridden by Lanette.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL, LH, and MARY are sitting in the square, although this time, LH is a lot steadier. BILL and LH stare at the latter’s phone with wide eyes and faces flushing. BILL coughs and pulls away.]_

**BILL, nervously:**  
So. Shall we check out those hot springs?

**LH:**  
…I think that will just give them more ideas, Bill.

_[MARY squeaks and looks up at the both of them inquisitively.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **mayakit asked:**  
>  SWSH Launch Event: I just had one last request before you guys leave. I remember back from when I was VERY young, I used to live near Circhester, and I remember they had a famous ancient bath, though only Pokemon use it now. Was wondering if The two of you might be willing to visit? I know it might be too cold in the city, but the bath might be hot enough for a flygon to be comfortable.

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Circhester Hot Springs, interior…ish, given the fact that the hot springs are partially outside. A handful of people and pokémon are gathered around its edges. LH and BILL—MARY has apparently been recalled by this point—enter and make their way towards an unoccupied edge. LH is holding the camera; BILL keeps his eyes on the water.]_

**LH:**  
Are you okay with this?

**BILL, whispering:**  
Are you kidding? This seems like a better idea than hanging about in the cold. I’m only sorry you can’t come in too.

_[LH laughs low. BILL gives her a smile, then slips into the pool. He darts out towards the middle, then gracefully comes back to rest his arms on the edge. He rests his chin on his arms and cocks his head, peering at LH curiously. She places the camera on the ground near the pool and slips off her shoes, then dips her feet into the water next to BILL. BILL turns over and leans his back against the edge, craning his neck to stare at the stone ceiling, and together, the two of them sit in silence for a few minutes.]_

**BILL, whispering:**  
So.

**LH:**  
So. Tomorrow we’ll be back at the Sea Cottage, won’t we?

**BILL:**  
Mmhmm. Thanks for coming with me, by the way. Did I ever thank you for that?

**LH, laughs:**  
You’re adorable sometimes, you know that?

**BILL:**  
Huh?

**LH:**  
Of course I’d come with you. You know, as much as I say you’re crazy for doing things like this, you still make my life interesting. How could I pass up a chance to go on an adventure like this with you? Besides. Somebody has to keep you out of trouble.

**BILL, laughing nervously:**  
Of course.

_[They sit in silence again for a long moment. After a while, LH’s hand drifts closer to BILL’s.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	21. Giant Scaly Cats

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  (swsh launch) Apparently some companies look to dragon pokemon to make deliveries in all sorts of weather. LH, do you think Bill's up to a pokejob or two?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[LH leaves a shop with a paper bag hanging from her wrist. A series of shouts alerts her to a commotion up the street, and she turns just in time to see BILL fly just above the crowds towards her. He lands heavily and skids to a halt in front of her, clutching the messenger bag around his shoulders. With a purr, he leans forward, prompting LH to pet his crest.]_

**LH:**  
I take it you had a good time.

**BILL, whispering:**  
A blast. They even let me keep the bag!

_[He takes off the bag and offers it to her.]_

**BILL:**  
It reminded me a lot of my side job in college. Almost makes me nostalgic, really.

_[LH smiles and takes the bag from him with her free hand.]_

**LH:**  
Sentimental, are we?

**BILL:**  
Hey now—I made some good poké coin out there. But what about you? How was your evening?

_[LH holds up the paper bag and winks at him.]_

**LH:**  
You’ll see.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **diabeticdino asked:**  
>  Sword/Shield Event - I've noticed that there's multiple toys in the camp sites which I have enjoyed using to play with my Pokemon. So my question to you is this: is there a preferred toy that Bill in Flygon form enjoys playing with, maybe to bond with his fellow dragons? Like maybe Dragapult, who is a good dragon? (ps - bonus points for opinions about Dragapult)

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[BILL and LH have stopped in a park. LH is sitting on a bench beside a walkway with the paper bag at her side; BILL is sitting on the walkway itself in front of her. The camera is apparently set somewhere on the bench, presumably on top of LH’s bag.]_

**BILL:**  
You know, this ask—and several others we’ve received while on this trip, of course—make me curious because they almost imply that our readers think I’m more flygon than—

_[LH draws a stick with a feather on the end of it out of the bag and waves it in front of BILL. He immediately stops and watches it carefully.]_

**LH:**  
Here’s a secret about dragon-types, readers: they may look ferocious, but a large number of them are nothing more than giant, scaly cats.

_[BILL growls, flygon-like, and bats at the feather before flopping over, tail wagging in the air and arms flailing in the feather’s general direction.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SW&SH event: Quick Bill! Before you turn back! You have to try an Exp candy so we can all finally know what it tastes like!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. This time, LH puts the stick aside and draws a candy out from the bag. She unwraps it, and BILL lifts his head, blinking.]_

**LH:**  
The other secret about dragon-types is when they’re not giant, scaly cats, they’re giant, scaly _dogs_.

_[She tosses the candy in the air, and BILL immediately jumps up and snaps it up, then settles back down at LH’s feet.]_

**BILL, through a full mouth:**  
That indignity aside … to answer this question, they generally taste like sour candy—sherbert lemons, I think they’re called. And they’re perfectly harmless to humans, so you could very well eat them yourself if you’re curious and don’t mind wasting a candy. Incidentally, they’re often known as rare candies elsewhere—or at least the less potent varieties are. Think of the more potent varieties as just … stronger-tasting candies.

_[He crunches through the candy, then shudders and swallows.]_

**BILL:**  
Bit too sweet for me, I’m afraid, but it isn’t bad.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	22. Click here if you like soft, shippy stuff.

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH, you guys said you'd spend a week in galar right? Anything you want to do last minute before heading back?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Evening. LH and BILL are seated in the cab of a ferris wheel overlooking Wyndon Stadium … and, for that matter, Wyndon as a whole. LH looks out, staring at the lights of the city for a long while.]_

**LH:**  
You know … I didn’t think this would be the last thing you’d like to do here.

**BILL, off-camera:**  
What do you mean? We’ve done practically everything else, haven’t we?

**LH:**  
Well … I mean, first off, you can fly, so it seems a little weird to go on a ferris wheel just for that.

**BILL:**  
It’s a world-famous ferris wheel, Lanette. _[laughs]_ But all right. You caught me. I thought you might like this. Seeing Wyndon from the air without going sixty miles an hour, I mean.

**LH, smiling:**  
Bill… _[looks at him]_ Okay, you’re right. It’s nice. _[turns back to the view]_ So … your family’s from here?

**BILL:**  
Not quite. We spent a few generations here, from the Renaissance to my father, but our roots are actually beyond Wedgehurst, close to the border between Galar and Auld Loch, but on the latter’s side. Supposedly, some of us are still there, but it’s hard to tell. It’s been centuries since my part of the family’s been in touch with anyone in Auld Loch. The Migration and all.

**LH:**  
Huh. That’s … interesting.

_[BILL snorts.]_

**BILL:**  
No, it isn’t.

**LH:**  
But it is! It’s like … there’s more to you than just pokémon, you know. I’d like to learn about that.

_[Silence. The cab moves.]_

**BILL:**  
Tell me about your family.

**LH:**  
Huh? Oh. Well … I guess in a lot of ways, I’m like you. Family’s half Hoennian, but we’re also from different regions. Galar too on my dad’s side, but his family left the region before yours did and spent a few generations in Unova. My grandfather came over to Hoenn during the Great War and just sort of … stayed. I guess you know the rest. I mean … I sort of tell you everything, don’t I? About my parents and everything else?

**BILL:**  
You do.

_[Another pause.]_

**BILL:**  
I apologize if I’ve ever seemed distant to you, by the way. I—

**LH, with another snort:**  
—treat pokémon as a conversation starter. I know. And it’s okay.

_[Pause.]_

**LH:**  
The thing you wanted to do tonight, for the last thing we do in Galar. You just wanted to talk, didn’t you?

_[Pause.]_

**BILL:**  
That obvious, huh?

_[The cab swings down and approaches its station.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	23. Fish and Chips and Killing the Mood

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  Bill towards the start: "Don't worry, I have perfect control over my body. My mind won't be hijacked by any 'Flygon instincts' or anything like that." / Lanette at the end: "yeah so bills pretty much a big scaly cat now watch him play with a feather and purr for headpats"

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[At a technical record store. LH flips through records, taking one out and examining it for a second before putting it back. BILL, meanwhile, is holding the camera and LH’s phone. He takes a shot of the ask, then pans upward with a sigh.]_

**BILL:**  
Lanette … why.

**LH, without looking up:**  
If you’re asking why you have to put up with the asks, I’d like to remind you that this was technically your idea.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  What "food" do flygons "normally" eat? And what's bills reaction or thought on such "food"?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[At a pub, in a back corner table. There’s a pint of cider and a plate with fish and chips in front of LH; in front of BILL—seated next to her—is a glass of water and a plate of raw sausages. Although BILL mostly eats the sausages, every so often, he sneaks a chip when LH supposedly isn’t looking.]_

**LH:**  
Well, flygon are technically omnivorous, but like a lot of dragon-types, they mostly feed on meat—the fresher the better. But because Bill isn’t exactly up for hunting, he’s mostly been eating pokémon kibble and whatever lean, raw meat I’ve been able to get from local butchers. Occasionally, he’ll let himself eat stuff like this, but we both know greasy, cooked meat isn’t exactly the best for flygon.

**BILL:**  
Everything in moderation, trainers. But yes, I couldn’t possibly bring myself to kill another living creature with my own claws, but strangely, I’ve adapted perfectly well to a raw diet. Still … I’m certainly looking forward to being human again. Raw meat isn’t disagreeing with me currently, but you have no idea how much I miss a cooked meal.

_[His claws creep towards the fries on LH’s plate again, but she slaps his hand away without even looking at him.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH Launch event: What is your opinion on the local fossils and their resurrections?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. BILL has his claws crossed in front of him.]_

**BILL, with a smile:**  
I have ideas.

**LH:**  
You really shouldn’t. _[sighs, taps her lips with a fry]_ Anyway, it’s a little … weird, if no one minds me saying. I know our original thought was that these were once close approximations of extinct pokémon in this region, but the more we learn about them, the more it’s clear that these are less close approximations of ancient pokémon and more tests to the capabilities of fossil resurrection. _[narrows her eyes]_ If you ask me, it seems a little off to be creating abominations for the sake of testing limits, but then again, these pokémon are somehow viable, healthy, happy creatures with no memory of not being strange combinations of creatures, so at the very least, that isn’t unethical. And I guess it does answer a few questions the other fossil institutes across the globe were asking. I mean, for one, we’re closer to figuring out why so many fossil pokémon are rock-types.

_[Long, long pause. LH’s eyes widen as she stares straight ahead.]_

**LH:**  
Will of the Titans, I’ve been hanging out with Bill too long.

**BILL:**  
Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself. You do have a point about fossil pokémon and the rock type.

_[LH doesn’t move or change expression; she just slides her eyes his way.]_

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	24. Lightning Round

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH launch - On a more tech-related subject than most of the conversation during your Galar trip, what's your take on the increasing use of trained Rotom in various technologies? It seems like not long ago they were seen as little more than a pest, constantly messing with peoples' appliances, and now some places use them with PCs?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Apparently the next day, BILL and LH are seated at the kitchen table of the Sea Cottage, with the camera on a tripod and LH’s phone in front of her.]_

**LH:**  
Okay, Bill. Lightning round to get rid of the rest of these. Ready?

**BILL:**  
Ready. Let’s go!

**LH:**  
Right. First one!

_[She pushes the phone to him. He glances at it and grins.]_

**BILL:**  
All right. Quite frankly, I think it’s fascinating. Not only are rotom given a steady home and supply of electrical sustenance, but the trade-off is a constant pokémon companion—one that, in certain cases, you can communicate with. So not only do we have the perfect tech-based assistant, but rotom receives both the nourishment and social contact it needs to survive in an environment free of any sort of competition or danger.

_[LH crosses her arms and leans into the table.]_

**LH:**  
Don’t you ever worry that rotom will lead a technological revolution against humankind?

_[Pause. BILL looks towards the ceiling.]_

**BILL:**  
Mmm … nope.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  SWSH: Bill, how does it feel to battle? Do you prefer it better than being a trainer?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
If I’m honest? I do prefer it to being a trainer. Then again, the entire reason why I don’t enjoy being a trainer is because I was never particularly good at coming up with strategies in the heat of the moment. As a pokémon, I can rely on a trainer I trust and wield the elements. Rather pales in comparison to being on the sidelines of a battlefield, if you ask me.

_[Slight pause.]_

**BILL:**  
Of course, there are drawbacks to being a pokémon in battle and benefits to being a trainer. For one, while it’s more exciting to wield elements than to lead pokémon into battle, this also means that I’m in the thick of danger. Granted, this is less painful and disconcerting than I had expected, but that still doesn’t change the fact that Moonblast _hurts_. Meanwhile, regarding being a trainer, well … pokémon are more inclined to trust and show affection for their human trainers than for fellow pokémon, and there’s a lot to be said of that companionship.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **dzamie asked:**  
>  (swish) Do Pokemon just not tend to like Bill, or has he been getting really unlucky with who Lanette has caught? Maybe they're jealous...

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. LH smiles knowingly.]_

**LH:**  
Well, newer pokémon sometimes don’t get along with the oldest members of a team because of jealousy, yes, and sometimes, it has to do with type bias, such as the fact that fairy-types are natural predators of dragon-types. But in this case, I think it’s just that Bill got off on the wrong foot with a lot of my team.

**BILL, muttering:**  
That’s putting it mildly. I can understand Ariel and Lacroix—because one is a fairy-type and the other I might have beaten in a few moves—but what about Evening?

**LH:**  
Oh, no, Evening likes you. Using Confusion to toss its teammates in the air is just how Galarian ponyta show affection.

_[Long pause.]_

**BILL:**  
I don’t feel like that’s true.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **nt1274 asked:**  
>  What did you miss most about being human? What are you gonna miss about being a Flygon?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene.]_

**BILL:**  
What do I miss about being human…? Probably my senses. I can’t even begin to describe how unnerving my sense of smell is, for one. _[pause]_ Well, that and being able to speak in public. I spent the majority of our vacation talking in low whispers so I wouldn’t attract attention, as it were. Quite honestly, I wouldn’t have _minded_ attention, but Lanette had a point that it would have made certain things far more difficult.

**LH:**  
That’s putting it mildly.

**BILL:**  
As for what I would miss about being a flygon, I know I’ve mentioned this in an earlier post, but … flight. _[pause, glances at LH]_ And, well. The entire adventure. 

**LH:**  
There’s something about a trainer’s journey that strengthens the bond of friendship, isn’t there?

**BILL, smirking:**  
That’s putting it mildly.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Bill the science flygon!

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. BILL stares directly into the camera with a bored expression for a long while.]_

**LH:**  
Be nice. That was a cute pun.

**BILL, sighing:**  
Right. Next question?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  I have seen a video of a Garchomp and a Flygon, swimming safely. not just standing in water, but outright swimming. would you be able to swim as well? because being able to swim could potentially be lifesaving in certain situations. also i'm imagining you replicating armaldo's swimming trick with your wings to be able to go rather fast, and Lanette using you as a jet ski. i mean sure, you could fly above the water, but maybe you'd gain a bit of resistance towards water by doing that?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. BILL props his chin up on a set of claws. LH leans back in her chair, arms crossed.]_

**BILL:**  
You know, there’s an ocean just outside.

**LH:**  
As we sort of found out in Circhester, Bill can swim too. I’m not completely surprised. Bill’s always been a stronger swimmer than the rest of us in the admin circle, probably because he’s always lived around water for some reason. Still, I was a little surprised to find out that’s a skill that transcends form. Especially since you were using your wings to do it.

**BILL:**  
Well, adaptation isn’t a big deal. And for those curious, yes, ground-types like flygon and garchomp can indeed swim; it’s just ill-advised that we spend excessive amount of time underwater—and that we dry off properly afterwards. With that said, though… _[eyes LH]_

**LH, grinning:**  
As tempting as it would be to test your swimming capabilities in the ocean, Bill, I hadn’t brought a bathing suit. _[leans towards him]_ Because it’s late autumn.

**BILL:**  
Ah. Fair point.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  I wonder if you could translate Lanettes pokemon for her? i mean, many trainers, as they get close to their pokemon, are able to figure out what they say, but that is still a bit different to full translations...

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. BILL cocks his head a little at this question.]_

**BILL:**  
I could, but I’m not sure she would like what they have to say. Especially Lacroix.

**LH:**  
Oh, come on, Bill. What’s the worst that could come out of something that tiny and cute?

_[BILL leans towards her and whispers something inaudible into LH’s ear. LH freezes, her face blanking.]_

**LH:**  
Oh.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_

* * *

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  @Lanette - Now that things are wrapping up, after this adventure we are curious, is there any chance, no matter how small or unlikely, that in the future you will try being a Pokémon after adventuring with Billgon? Even just as a passing curious itch to scratch? If so, what Pokémon would you choose to become? Sylveon perhaps? (Bill would probably be amused by that) or maybe something humanoid so it's not *too* much of a change like Lopunny?

> **Anonymous asked:**  
>  Lanette, would you ever consider becoming a pokemon for a while? and if so, what would you choose?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Same scene. LH exhales.]_

**LH:**  
You know, as interesting as the thought is, I’ll have to pass. I’m perfectly happy being human. 

**BILL:**  
Would this have something to do with the procedure carrying certain risks?

_[LH cringes a little at this question.]_

**LH:**  
Bill, look, I trust you, but—

**BILL:**  
Hey, it’s okay. I understand. I don’t think I’d let you go through with this myself. Certainly, I’m confident in my tech, but until I can get a guarantee that there are absolutely no risks involved, I don’t think I could bring myself to place anyone else in my shoes, so to speak. [shrugs] Besides, given our dynamic, I get the feeling I wouldn’t be much of a trainer for you.

_[LH laughs and smiles broadly but fixes her eyes on the table.]_

**LH:**  
Yeah, you wouldn’t be able to handle me. Even if I were a sylveon. Which, incidentally, is absolutely what I’d choose.

**BILL:**  
What, really?

_[She winks at him.]_

**LH:**  
Too late to take back your answer.

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


	25. Close enough?

_[BEGIN TRANSMISSION]_

_[Sea Cottage Laboratory, a mirror of the first log. LH stands at the controls; BILL stands before the teleporter. Off to the side, PRIMROSE and ARIEL can just barely be seen, chattering to each other excitedly.]_

**LH:**  
Ready?

**BILL:**  
Yes. You know what to do, right?

**LH:**  
Wait for your signal. Hit the button. Pull the lever.

**BILL:**  
You got it. _[looks at her]_ Hey. I had a great time this week.

**LH:**  
Same here.

_[They look at each other for a long time. They don’t have to say anything here. The silence between them is warm and speaks volumes. Finally, BILL starts for the teleporter.]_

**BILL:**  
Right. Well … see you on the other side.

**LH:**  
Wait!

_[BILL stops and swivels around to face her, wide-eyed and waiting. LH steps away from the console and to a workbench. As she walks, she pulls a poké ball out and brings it to full size. Once she reaches the bench, she sets the ball on its worn surface and picks up the hammer.]_

**LH:**  
Almost forgot this. I don’t want it to mess anything up.

_[With that, she uses the hammer to smash the ball. BILL flinches, then full-on recoils and even growls a little as he watches. A blue light washes over him and vanishes, just as LH finishes utterly destroying the ball. And then, BILL straightens. Blinks. Shakes himself and stands, as if he hadn’t just experienced anything that would make him flinch that hard.]_

**LH:**  
There. _[motions to the pile of junk that had been a poké ball with the hammer]_ Now you’re free.

_[She sets the hammer on the workbench and strides back to her place. With a smile, she rests her hand on the button.]_

**LH:**  
Okay. Now I’m ready.

_[BILL relaxes.]_

**BILL:**  
You… _[shakes his head]_ Thanks, Lanette. _[enters the teleporter]_ Okay! Hit it!

_[LH presses the button, and the machine whirs to life. Just as it had a week ago, bright lights fill both chambers of the teleporter, then flash. The whole contraption hums and whirs, the cacophony growing louder and louder until, at its peak, LH pulls the lever. There’s a loud hiss, followed by a series of bangs; one of the pods even shakes. And then, with one last, great bang and even greater flash, the doors open, and a cloud of smoke pours out into the lab, just as it had the first time around. LH sputters and takes a few steps back from the console, then rushes forward, towards the teleporter.]_

**LH, coughing:**  
Bill? Are you okay?!

_[As if to answer her, a shape stumbles out of the teleporter. It’s BILL, perfectly human and, aside from the coughing fit from the smoke, apparently no worse for wear. As the smoke clears, LH rushes forward to catch him before he spills onto the floor, and he leans against her, he winces at the smoke on the ground.]_

**BILL:**  
I really need to fix that.

**LH:**  
Never mind that! Are you okay?! I mean—

_[BILL grasps her arm and smiles at her.]_

**BILL:**  
Relax. Perfectly all right. _[stands straight]_ See?

**LH:**  
But … you’re fine? I mean … you’re not in pain, and you don’t feel weird or—

**BILL:**  
Hey.

_[He grabs her by the shoulders and pulls himself in close, forcing her to stop immediately.]_

**BILL:**  
I’m fine. Okay?

**LH:**  
O-okay. _[nods]_ So … so where did your clothes go? I mean … the laws of physics…

_[BILL blinks, then breaks down into snickering.]_

**BILL:**  
That’s your first—never mind. It’s better to not think of it, Lanette. Trust me. Now… _[pulls away a little and looks to a spot beyond the camera]_ Would you like some coffee? I could certainly use—

_[LH suddenly embraces him. He freezes, visibly confused now.]_

**LH:**  
It’s good to have you back. Please let this be the last time you do something like this.

_[BILL hesitates for a second, his expression a little distant. Then, he exhales and wraps one of his arms around her with a warm smile.]_

**BILL:**  
As I recall, you encouraged me to do this. And you were enjoying some of it, if I’m not mistaken.

**LH:**  
I know. _[pulls away]_ But still, that last run through the teleporter…

_[She trails off. BILL looks at her sideways, then grasps her wrist.]_

**BILL:**  
If it reassures you at all, then … all right. I’ll retire this project, and that will be the last adventure I’ll have as a pokémon. I promise.

**LH:**  
Okay. _[nods, starts walking off-screen]_ I’ll … I’ll go up and make some coffee for us. Come up when you’re ready?

**BILL:**  
Of course.

_[She leaves. He hesitates in her absence, then moves to the camera. ARIEL and PRIMROSE resume chattering behind them after having spent the past few minutes silent.]_

**BILL:**  
Well, one exciting week wrapped up. I’ll have to analyze the data we’ve collected some other time. I’d do it now and log a formal conclusion, but quite honestly, as much as I’d hate to admit it, I’m utterly exhau—

_[He stops, as if something had just dawned on him. Abruptly, he whirls around to see PRIMROSE waving a screwdriver in the air and chattering quickly and ARIEL responding from his perch on a cardboard box. Neither of them notice BILL watching them in a mixture of shock and curiosity.]_

**BILL:** What…?

_[END TRANSMISSION]_


End file.
